(IN)SANITY RESTORED

The Solution

2011-09-14T15:58:00.008+05:30

"The solution to the problems of politics is more politics and better politics; not destroying politics or reviling politics or contempt for political process."
~
Dr. Jayaprakash Narayan, Lok Satta.

And, all we is do is sit here and call them crooks. Human beings, by nature, are obsessed with power - the aphrodisiac that absolutely corrupts. So if you are the kind that is pointing fingers at the corrupt, then dare yourself to take their place and change the system.

Be the change. Effectuate it.

Downs, Troughs n More Sulking :)

2010-01-10T23:58:00.003+05:30

After an 8 month hiatus, I am here, wanting to put into words.

There was a time when time was in abundance and I didn't know what to do with the time on hand. That was IIT.

Now I have to scamper through umpteen pages, do analysis, read abstract crap - most of which makes no sense. Then get myself tested and graded with the multitude of quizzes. Subsequently I m made to feel like a load of crap looking at my pathetic display at them. This is IIM - IIMA to be more precise and exact.

02/09/2010
(Typed out of frustration in early January. Back then, I wanted to talk about bigger things that were happening to me but couldn't muster enough courage to post 'em here. :-/
Now the last 8 months look passe. I don't think I now actually care so much about it. Just some passing phases in life. But we grow up, don't we?
Anyways, Just posting this for posterity. Someday I'd look back and realize how I'd felt and then maybe have a good laugh over it.)

Life is full of surprises!!!

2009-07-31T17:13:00.000+05:30

Ok. I meant Surprise Quizzes.

At least my life @ IIM A is.

PS: Too many surprises don't make many more surprises.

Crap

2009-06-27T19:14:00.001+05:30

It is in the unlikeliest places that you’ll find the things that you are desperately looking for.

Does the heart know what the head is up to? And vice versa? If they do, then do they concur? If they don’t which one comes out trumps? Maybe I am 2 selves rolled into one. :|

Sometimes we ignore people and do not care. It is not until someone else ignores us that we realize the pain that we similarly inflicted on another.

You come in unannounced. You create questions. And then you walk out. So do I not get a say in anything? Isn't it a violation of my rights?

There is this person that loves you. You are aware of that. But you keep them at a distance but dexterously manage to keep them within your line of vision and still taunt them and ignite new hope. Is there a sadistic pleasure you can derive from that?

Do you look at somebody and think that they do not deserve all that they have? Or maybe that you deserve all that more than that person did? Or maybe been seen in such a way? It is deviously unfathomable that one can think that way, and trust me when I say what I say, there could be nothing more awkward than that.

PS : Some crap I wrote waaayyyy back.

Tips to Bell the CAT

2009-05-29T00:41:00.006+05:30

P.S: Wrote this on request. Felt that it would help many if I shared it here.
P.P.S: Use the Toggle screen button on the top right of the Scribd embed box for full screen view.

Contemplations

2009-05-26T23:51:00.003+05:30

On the way home from office today, I realized something. It is precisely this time I can consider my “Alone Time” – time I get to be with none other than myself, time to think about self, coupled with a blank, idle mind devoid of work related tensions and with ample time for contemplations.

Done with work for the day, I stumble along the pavement to the bus stop. As I wait for a bus that ain’t crowded or for a cab to arrive, I am usually lost in thought. Probably, I am a thinking person. I do the math -- various permutations and combination -- of the multitude of situations and relationships involving me as also the peripheral ones. Meanwhile, a cab/bus with a vacant window seat comes by and I hop on. I take my seat, unlock the window so as to allow an optimum breeze, arising out of the vehicle in motion, to trickle along the perimeter of my face. And then, inevitably, I get lost in my train of thoughts again.

Does anybody in the world ever care about my existence?
How would it be if I didn’t exist?
What is the very purpose of this existence?
Do I feel like I belong?
Will I ever find anybody who will be my ‘someone special’?
Will I ever be anything other than single?
Will somebody ever feel possessive about me?
Why do I not have anybody to share all my feelings with?
What is it that makes somebody that ‘someone special’?
And the train of thought goes on building………………………

And then I alight from the bus, reach home and find signs of habitation. Lo, Poooffffff.....The thoughts that have built up vaporize all of a sudden and I am restored back to reality, to normalcy.

With just a few more days of office life remaining, as I write this piece, I surely think I will miss my ‘alone time’. Through all the negativism and the emotional turmoil it generates, I always wished I could avoid it. But in laughing at my pitiable state, I have been able to unearth new strengths and extract previously unfound answers about a lot many things. Whether the renowned academic rigour at WIMWI would allow me my share of contemplations daily is to wait and watch for.

Lazy Weekend

2009-05-04T01:09:00.005+05:30

It's been a pretty lazy weekend. Just like any other I've had at Bangalore. Earlier it was the weekly Mock CAT, then the preparations for the GD/PI that kept me engaged and made me stay home. Now there is pretty much nothing on my plate but it still is somehow the same.
With just 1 more month left to savor Bangalore, I seriously hoped for some action. But it just isn't destined to be. Initially the weekend was earmarked for a few treats and a couple of parties to attend. But then a sudden, pleasant surprise had me rescheduling, read cancelling, all my previous plans and left me anticipating a fun weekend. But when you make plans, they are bound to get screwed up. It always happens with me. And get screwed, they did. Royally, in fact.
With all plans conking out, I was really left with nothing better to do but watch soaps on my lappy on a "sooper lazy Sunday". Again..... Sigh!!!

The WIMWI dream

2009-04-15T03:48:00.007+05:30

Sometimes you dream. Day in Day out. You work hard. But it so happens that your dreams do not fructify. For whatever reasons.

So what next? You either persevere and try hard one more time to let your dreams materialize or else you seek the escape route and aspire for something else.

Getting into the top B schools in the country has always been my dream. After the CAT fiasco last year, I decided not to give CAT again – CAT dumped me once and so I told myself that I hated it. But in actuality, I lost all belief that I could clear CAT and was just seeking the escape route.

But then again, we can never really be the master of our own destiny -- Can we?. Certain circumstances made me rethink my stance. I pushed myself to give CAT again this year. I started preparing in earnest. The resentment towards it easily sobered. Somewhere still, there was this doubt implanted in my mind frame that said I still wouldn’t be able to clear it. Yet, I just egged myself on. I persevered.

There is this amazing quote attributed to Paulo Coelho which goes “When you really want something to happen, the whole universe conspires so that your wish comes true”.

I really wanted to clear CAT. And I gave it my all. The result was a GD/PI call from each of the 6 IIM’s.

Admittedly, the GD/PI scene was an altogether different ball game. A New Arena. Still I held the same mantra. Desire + Hardwork + Perseverance.

After a struggle through the interview season, I now stand with admits from all the IIMs save K. I Finally stand Vindicted.

A dream that has been long in the making has finally been brought to fruition. It still all feels like a hazy dream and the feeling is yet to sink in.

With the choice I had in hand, I wasn’t amazingly spoilt for choice. It had always been about a single entity – IIM A. I knew my destiny. I knew where I'd be going.

IIM A. My destiny. My dream.

So Vastrapur!!! Here I come to live my dream. :)

PS : 1) Dream and then work hard. Nothing is unattainable.

2) WIMWI stands for Well Known Institute of Management in Western India.i.e IIM A

3) GD/PI = Group Discussions/Personal Interview.

IIM GD/PI Experiences

2009-04-15T03:35:00.008+05:30

Providing the links for my GD/Essay/PI experiences for admission to the various IIMs for the academic year 2009-11. I've tried to be as detailed as possible.

IIM A Essay/PI Experience

IIM B GD/Summary/PI Experience

IIM C PGDM GD/PI Experience

IIM C PGDCM PI Experience

IIM L Essay/GD/PI Experience

IIM I Essay/GD/PI Experience

IIM K GD/PI Experience

PS : I benefited immensely from reading past interview experiences at Pagalguy. I hope my posts would be of use in a similar fashion. There have also been few individuals wanting to know more about my interviews and hence I am posting them here. Not self propaganda in any way.

Questions???

2009-03-29T19:57:00.006+05:30

"Do I love you because you're beautiful,
Or are you beautiful because I love you?
Am I making believe I see in you
A girl too lovely (perfect) to be really true?
Do I want you because you're wonderful
Or are you wonderful because I want you?
Are you the sweet invention of a lover's dream
Or are you really as beautiful as you seem?"

Subtly engendering the true feelings of any lovelorn person, this beautiful lyrical composition from Cinderella raises a few alarming questions in my head. The chimera of the perfect person that one falls in love with and the actual person might actually be nowhere remotely similiar (as is mostly the case). So, why create the illusion in the first place?

Sitting, Waiting, Wishing

2009-03-29T19:34:00.003+05:30

I let go of your hand. I wished I could hold it longer. I just wished.

I pined for you to come back. I was quite sure you would return. “If your love is true, Let go of it. It will surely return back.” So went the saying. That’s what the crappy movies made me believe.

I kept waiting. I still keep waiting. Will you return?

*********************************************

You let go of my hand. Couldn’t you have held it longer? As you unwrapped your fingers along my wrist, I wished for them to stay and strengthen the clasp. Alas, It wasn’t meant to be.

I wished you would understand the hurt. I longed for you to grip my hand again. I waited for a while – It seemed like it were ages.

Then we drifted apart. We still keep drifting apart. Now I can no more see you.

I would do anything to feel the grip of your hand on my wrist. But if I return, will you take me back? Worse still, Will you even be waiting?

Crush

2009-02-12T18:09:00.005+05:30

Awesome Song by David Archuleta -- The runner up at American Idol 2008.

Been on my playlist for a long, long time. Hence wanted to share. I suppose every guy would have experienced feelings similiar to the ones in the song -- at least once in their lifetime!!!

I suppose I need to listen to newer songs. Suggestions nebody???

Silent Tears!!!

2009-01-26T23:16:00.008+05:30

Every day, I wait for you. You never come.

Yet I persevere. One day I hope you will. With this hope, I live.

The last time I waited through the wee hours of the night. It was freezing. The cold tested my guts. I was frozen to the bone. I could have so easily quit. But then the pain was obscured by the joy in persevering with the thought that you would arrive. You never did.

**********************************************

I could not sleep. You were in all my thoughts. I tried shutting you off my thoughts. I cleared my mind. I assumed I was at peace.

You somehow found the way to claw back.

When did I bestow this power upon you? Never realized all the way, that giving you this power was nothing but losing a few powers myself.

**********************************************

It looked like an old folded piece of paper. I was about to dispose it off in the dustbin. But the writing seemed familiar. I opened the paper. It was one of the many letters you had written.

In flooded a multitude of thoughts. I was caught in a time warp – transporting me along a chain of events that resulted in the letter and the events that ensued thereafter. It still is a distinct memory. I felt like I was in a trance. I scurried out of it.

How a piece of paper could affect me so much still escapes me?

I quickly tore it to shreds and slowly they floated through the air and found their way into the dustbin.

**********************************************

I wake up every morning. The first thing that I come across in the morning is your face. Consider me superstitious. I believe you bring me luck.

I’ve never told this to you.
I’ve always wanted to tell you this. I’ve wanted to tell you this and much more.

But you never gave me the chance.

***********************************************

You are guilty as charged.

I hurt myself. I inflict pain upon myself. You make me do this. The thought of you makes me do this. I journey through a spiral of ache whenever I think of you.

So doesn’t that make you the culprit?

***********************************************

You passed by. You never even noticed. I thought that was an anomaly.

The next time too, you did the same. I still wanted to consider it an aberration. Maybe you were pre-occupied with something else. One part of me told that everything wasn’t quite right but another part of me just refused to listen.

You do that even to this day. The two parts inside of me still conflict. When will you realize my existence and put an end to this tussle?

V

2008-12-26T00:56:00.009+05:30

"But on this most auspicious of nights, permit me then, in lieu of the more commonplace sobriquet, to suggest the character of this dramatis persona.

Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin van-guarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition.

The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous.

Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it's my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V."

Howzzat for an Introduction!!! Or should I call it a fustian rant, even better a Vainglorious Vaudevillian Verbiage???

Today being X'Mas, we are lucky to have an off day. So, I was lazing through the entire day watching movies on my laptop. And as I was watching V, I couldn't help but notice how heavily the dialogues leaned towards usage of the words starting with the letter 'V'. What ingenuity I say!!! Insane Creativity and Such minute attention to detail.
Bloody Brilliant!!! Freakin' Awesome!!!

Chains!!!

2008-12-25T23:00:00.005+05:30

Oh!!! Bugger off!!!

That was sweet......

I think I am beginning to like you.

I really really like you.

I miss you every moment you are not with me.

I think, I really think you are the one for me. Is this what is called LOVE???

I hate you. For all the pain I inflict on myself because of You.

Confused!!! :) Will you wait for me??? 'Coz I am pretty sure you are the one for me.

It was a huge mistake. I hate YOU -- for leaving me stranded.

You've made my Life miserable. You've got to take the whole blame. I HATE YOU -- from the depths.

I need help.

It's Ok. Life moves on.

I don't feel that miserable anymore. Infact, I feel fine.

I still miss you sometimes. I think of what could have been. But it still is pretty fine.

???

P.S: Watching ESOTSM multiple times can do this to you. :P Inspired from the awesome idea that is ESOTSM. :)

B'day Wishes

2008-11-09T23:32:00.005+05:30

My Birthday is the only day of the year when my phone in a single day gets as much exercise as it normally does in almost a month. Thanks a tonne to all those who remembered the day and kept me engaged on the phone and my apologies to those that I couldn't attend to at the first go, either because I was sleeping or because I was at work.

Coming to Birthday wishes, they are of many a kind.

Some you expect. And you get. Like your parents. Your close kin. Friends in your inner circle. They've wished you each year. They continue to. They most probably will continue to(I Hope). You feel blessed to have them on your side -- willing you on in your endeavors, wishing you the very best in life. These wishes are those that fill your heart with their warmth.

Then there are some you least expect. They come from nowhere -- just like that, a bolt out of the blue. An old school mate who hasn't spoken to you in years. The guy who was your constant company when you went home for holidays. These are mostly unexpected and it thrills you that somebody so out of touch could still remember your birthday and did call to wish you. These are very very sweet and really touching gestures.

Then there are few you very much expect. But which you don't get. Maybe that person has forgotten your birthday. So you call that person and remind them that its your birthday and coax wishes out of them somehow hinting that it is your birthday. :) These wishes are slightly tricky -- there is a tinge of disappointment that your birthday has been forgotten but you are happy you've been wished finally.

And then there are those few who forget. And which you do nothing about but just remember that they'd have wished you if you turned back the clock. Maybe now they are far away. Maybe you've moved far away. These hurt -- not because they forgot but because you can sense the wane in the relation.

Quite some reflection, huh. All in all, a very Interesting Birthday this, I must say.

MAD

2008-11-09T23:03:00.004+05:30

When you cannot be mad at somebody, no matter what they do, you know for sure that you are at the focal point of attraction in your relationship curve.

When you cannot 'stay' mad at somebody for long, then you know that your relationship has mellowed over time and that you've found optimum comfort levels with each other.

Virtual Spaces and Reality!!!

2008-10-30T14:39:00.006+05:30

"With you around me(in virtual space, yeah) life was so much easy, so much fun, so much to look forward to.
Now that you are no more near(in soul perhaps) I miss you, I miss the very thought of you."

P.S : Wow!!! There it goes, off my chest!!!
Never thought I'd ever express it, let alone feel that way. Life can get so filmy, duh.

TGIF!!! Naah

2008-10-17T21:09:00.006+05:30

"Friday", he prophesized, "Friday my friend, You realise how the whole universe is conspiring against you -- hatching the most devilish plot against you".

"How is that?", I queried.

"Hmm.... Here's what happens. Listen. You come to office on Friday anticipating the weekend ahead and you see loads of work dumped onto you. It is late in the evening when you see people trickling out but you know you are going to be in for a couple more hours at least. Your plans to go hit the pub scene are in a disarray. You see your ex flame online and can do nothing but feel bad the relation should've worked. The ones with whom you've made plans for the evening have dumped you to go ahead with them, albeit without you. And then at last, you somehow manage to shut the system off and move out. You trudge your way back home when you see enthusiastic couples vrooming past you on bikes, presumably to the disco. You manage to utter a 'ptch' and continue moving ahead. You realise you are left to yourself and have no company for supper and you also do not know where to go and hence decide to skip it. Further, it dawns on you that you have the weekend ahead and you have 'absolutely' nothing to do. In that moment of solitude and helplessness, you begin to realise how F**ked up you are and what a pathetic state you are in. And then it hits you and it seeps in....... "

PS : Tried reproducing verbatim.
Today I think I am a little close to knowing how he felt....

The Image Search for Answer Tag

2008-09-13T23:40:00.013+05:30

The concept:

* For the 20 questions that have been asked, write down your honest answer (in a word or two).
* Type your answers, one by one, on an exactly-as-written-on-paper basis, in the search bar of any image search engine that you prefer (Flickr / Google Image Search etc.).
* You MUST use the same search engine for all 20 answers.
* For every answer, only from the FIRST page of the search result, save exactly ONE image.
* Once you have a list of 20 images, each corresponding to one answer, compose a post in line with this post that you are reading right now.

I was tagged by: TwilightFairy

I tag: Kishore

Image Search Engine used: Flickr

1. My age:

2. I am passionate about:

Books

3. My favorite place:

Beach n The Sand

4. I have a thing for:

Music

5. My comfort zone:

My Bedroom

6. My favorite animal:

Squirrel

7. My kind of art:

Graffiti

8. The town where I was brought up:

Vijayawada

9. The town where I live:

Bangalore

10. A past pet:

Dog

11. A past love:

Basketball

12. Current Love:

13. Best Friends Nickname:

Dumbass

14. I want:

To break Free

15. Screen Name:

Shared

16. A bad habit:

Sleeping

17. A dream:

To conquer the world

18. First job:

Design Studio

19. I miss:

College Life

20. What am I doing right now?

Listening to music

Proximity -- It's in the mind!!!

2008-09-08T01:46:00.010+05:30

"Though we were miles apart, we used to be very close. Now that we live in the same city, we feel so far off."

Damn it!!! The Irony of Life!!!

P.S: Ever felt that way???

Crush.... Crushes???

2008-09-02T00:19:00.008+05:30

"Why do I fall in love with every girl who shows me the least bit of attention?"

Kudos to Charlie Khaufman & Michael Gondry for coming up with ESOTSM and, in particular, this piquant yet piercing quote.

Spooky......

2008-08-20T14:54:00.008+05:30

Completely took me by surprise, Though I must admit I do not entirely agree with what it is trying to convey.......

P.S : 'Twas a long time back.

Job Life

2008-08-16T13:45:00.002+05:30

--Job Life gives you (almost) zero time to blog.
--Mornings on the job are most productive. After lunch, drowsiness takes over. (The sumptuous free lunch at office is to blame.)
--Flexi Timings are a boon. Sleep till 9:30 am and reach the office at 10:30.am. You are still in 30 mins before your boss. ;)
--Lunch at 1:30 pm daily. Now look at the previous two statements and decide for yourself.
--Job Life isn't totally disconnected from College life.
a) The college lingo stays. You get to hear 'seriously', 'obviously', 'actually' and the ilk very very frequently.
b) People still need just the slightest excuse to demand (and take) treats and parties.
c) Sex Ratio is as skewed as it is at IIT's.
--Job Motto : Work Hard, Party Harder.
--You cannot chat that frequently with friends. But you itch to do so.
--Job gives you a reason to talk to just people you want to. If you don't feel like, you can always tell them you are busy.
--Company's laptop has a zillion apps running on it at the same time - Secure Vaults, Backup Softies, Encryptors... What not!!! Damn irritating....
--The worst part about it are the Hazaar passwords.
--Listening to songs on the job is a great way to relax.
a) Your boss will think twice before he disturbs you.
b) You get to make people believe you are actually seriously working.
--It's hard to make friends in your team. It's everybody for him/herself.
--You ought to smile/laugh for some dumb (Dumb as Dumb can get) jokes. Must be careful not to hurt anybody's feelings. Mind you, It's real Hard.
--Etiquette, Decorum, Team Ethics..... Aaahhh!!! So many formalities. Well at least I get to dress up informal.
--8.5 (8 + .5 for lunch) hours of Office daily. 8 hours of Sleep. That's my Weekday.
--5 days of office. 2 days of Rest/Lazing around at home. Week goes by pretty fast. Weekend moves even faster. Life's picked up a great deal of pace, it feels. It's quite nice working and earning and being self sufficient.
--Am I satisfied??? For now, YES. But I got to study further and the plans need to be made and executed. Wish me Luck........

Guy Songs

2008-08-16T11:49:00.007+05:30

I'd presumed that lovey-dovey heartbreak songs were always meant to be feminine. Not that I don't expect heartbreak in the male dominion, just that I don't expect them to make their feelings public -- some sort of chivalry one could say.

But then chanced upon these two lovely songs that entirely quashed my theory. Pure Macho, Mannish Heartbreak. Is there any chance the heartbreak and the emotions are actually genuine???

I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes
And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And havin' so much to say
And watchin' you walk away

P.S: I'm a hopeless romantic... Duh!!!

2008-07-14T11:52:00.001+05:30

Never love anyone so much as to give them the power to hurt you.
--
Some filmy Quote

P.S : When will people ever learn???

The Best Gift -- Ever !!! :)

2008-07-11T22:39:00.005+05:30

When the night is so cold,
and you are finding things hard,
When you feel you are nothing,
another body to discard,
When you are feeling empty,
and inside you are numb,
When memories haunt you,
and you regret things you've done.
Just remember the faith,
that I will always have in you,
Remember the strength of your soul,
that you use to get through,
Remember I am here forever,
to help you through that night,
The one that feels never- ending,
the one that fills you with fright,
Remember my hand holding yours,
and the pureness in your heart,
I will be here until the end,
even if i was not here at the start.
I'll always be there at heart...!!

P.S : Something I received for my last Birthday. Just thought I'd share it -- before it fades into oblivion.

The Holy Town and my Bizarre Wish

2008-06-03T00:56:00.005+05:30

Tirupati was one enlightening and exhilarating trip – For two reasons.

One, Mom and Me got ample mother-son time, talking about minutiae – something we haven’t had a chance to do in a long, long time. (Yeah, she got hold of all my new girlfriends and imaginary ones at that).
Two, I had a chance to rest after the hectic BTP time – tortuous to say the least.

I do not know what it is about the temple town that keeps bringing me back , but I for sure know that I will keep coming back. Tirumala, the temple town, has its own old world charm – the constructions and facilties are amongst the most modern available – but there is that radiance in the place and devotion in the air, a rarity in the modern world. For once you feel transported to a different land where the path to Nirvana replaces El Dorado for countless sinners turned devotees.

Most of the people who know me tend to mostly believe that I am an atheist. Well, this must serve to clear the airs, I am no atheist. I do pray when I have an exam or when I am mired in troubles (Just like the vast majority out there :P ).

I walked all the way to the top (from Alipiri to Tirumala), must have been around 10 kms. The ascent started with a series of steep steps for about 3kms (89.5 degrees steep it felt). Anyways, when I look back and see, I just find no reason why I walked. Was I trying to see if I was fit? Did I want to try and immerse myself in God for sometime and try experiencing his pull? I seriously don’t know. Did I ask God for a favour in making the climb??? Hell, No. If only I had. Anyways, I made interesting observations as I made the climb. You should try it once.

I have been to this place umpteen times. The mad rush just seems to keep growing year after year. You hardly get to see the Deity in the heart of the temple for 5 seconds. Yet in the mere 5 seconds of my presence in the Sanctum Sanctorum, the absolute radiance, and the spiritual high is something I always look forward to. And in those 5 seconds a small prayer indefinitely escapes my lip – thanking the Lord for what I am and asking him for a small favour each time. This is my yearly ritual with the Lord, but this time I asked him for one of the most bizarre wishes – I hope he isn’t stunned by the wackiness of my ask. Well, about the wish, I’d make it public if it is delivered, or else it’ll be our little secret.

Waves and Ice Cream

2008-05-12T03:09:00.011+05:30

We sat there by the lake, watching the sun set, observing the tiny waves hit the embankment, whisk up a white foam and then roll back, giving way for a new set of waves to reconstruct the visual treat. A sea of people floated around us but both of us were oblivious to any other presence. We didn’t talk much to each other either but we were quietly basking in each other’s company. It was our first meeting in 2 years.

We had known each other for years. We used to live in the same neighbourhood. We would have crossed each others paths over a thousand times on the street. We acknowledged each others presence but we never spoke to each other. Wait….. We did talk once. “Here’s your kerchief”, I said, returning the one she’d dropped. She just smiled back. Just like she always did.

Then my family had to relocate to another town. We moved. A year flew by. Then suddenly, one day, out of the blue, I found a familiar sounding name in my inbox. I hurried to look at the contents.

Hi,
I hope you do remember me. It would be great to get back in touch.
Yours,
X.

My heart almost skipped a beat. Where did she get my address from? “It would be great to get back in touch”, she had said. Did she think we had been in touch?

But I was genuinely touched by the warmth and the sincerity of that cute lil’ mail. I was surprised but I liked it that she remembered me. What pains would she have gone through to get back in touch with me.

I replied back. And, so it began. We mailed each other frequently. The size of the mails increased exponentially with time. She listened to all my drivel, she advised me on most matters, she comforted me when I was blue and she heard me, no matter what I spoke about. She became the bearer of my secrets. She didn’t blabber as much as I did, but the introvert that she was, I knew she spoke minimum. Mails flew thick and fast. Before we knew what hit us, we progressed from being virtual strangers to being best buddies. She often kept telling me how lucky she was to have me as a friend. I reciprocated.

Then one day, I was to go to her town on some work. She insisted on meeting. I was excited. I thought of a 1000 things to do when I’d meet her. I could have made a list.

I suggested the lake. And there we were, having shared all our emotions on a virtual platform, unable to express ourselves as we faced each other. How Ironic it felt!!! Nothing from my list materialised. Still, it was very memorable.

We had an ice cream. She loved Butterscotch. I remembered. She smiled that I remembered.

Time flew that day. Or so it felt. It was time to bid goodbye. The heart was getting heavy. I was secretly wishing for time to come to a standstill. But then all things have to end. And so we parted ways.

We would have talked about that meeting a hundred times again -- whenever we met online. It was to be our moment of madness and also our fall back point -- The memento of our relationship. I savoured it truly. I think she did too.

Then, One day, as I was chatting with her, she told me she got engaged. I couldn’t react. I did not know how to react. I wished her the best and with her permission, I logged out. It took some time to sink in. Did that mean we could no longer be friends? It all seemed to be getting strange. Every thought of mine complicated my thinking further.

The next time I met her online, it all appeared Platonic. “Hi”, I said. “Hi”, she replied. A long bout of silence ensued. We chatted a few times after that. But we never got anywhere. Things had changed.

Nowadays, when I come online, I search for her name on my list. Just a Matter of Habit.

We cross each others paths online these days. I acknowledge her presence. I secretly hope she does too. We haven’t spoken since.

Life comes a Full Circle, I heard. Pearls of Wisdom. Take my word for it.

P.S: Thanx are due to TwilightFairy, whose posts inspire me.

P.P.S: As I reread what I've written, I have a sense of deja vu. Do I happen to have read something similar? Does it sound too cliched? Anyways, Cheers to my First Shot at Short Stories.

Who's Cuter: The Pug or The Girl ???

2008-04-25T01:06:00.013+05:30

Advertising is an art. It either makes or breaks a brand.

I loved Hutch ads -- more so, the pug in it. When Hutch became Vodafone, off went the pug. The effervescence and the warmth in the ads went missing and Vodafone ads turned out insipid and bland --Well, until they decided to bring back the pug.

So, the Vodafone guys take the pug and add some really lilting music and come up with an amazingly cute concept. And launch a massive campaign in the midst of IPL.
Stroke of Genius!!!

It's been a hot topic for discussion since, almost as much as IPL itself. Ever since I've seen the ad, I've been humming the jingle a lot. It's so damn addictive. Listen to it and then try getting it off your lips. :)

Everyday I want to fly, stay by my side...
Everyday I want to dream, stay by my side...

Every morning I wish I could just play....
Wish the mornings would just stay...

P.S: However cute this ad maybe, the Vodafone network in Bengal sucks big time. Period. Time for some magic from the ad to rub off on the network here.

Video Courtesy of Dave/Street'Dog'/10.110.9.49 :P

Down Memory Lane

2008-04-19T15:40:00.015+05:30

RK Hall, Main Building, Dost Log(Couldn't get all in one),Mech Dep

As 4 years of IIT draw to a close (and as the final end sems draw near), it feels apt to take a trip down nostalgia lane. 4 years ago, I set foot into IIT with starry eyes and lofty ambitions. Will that 'ME' be satisfied with the 'ME' that is all set to roll out of this place??? So much has happened over the course of 4 years that I feel it should all be chronicled.

Had fun. Had mastooo fun. Awesome Section 8 in the first year. Made great friends. Bunked a lot of classes. Nasty NCC camp. Movie sessions in my room. Learnt cards games (Rummy and Bluff). Helped friends copy during exams. Supercool Darjeeling Trip. Steeled the rigorous OP period. Watched tonnes and tonnes of movies. Lost track of time playing QuizRoom1 -- Jumble + Trivia. Basketball. Exacting Mech dep courses. Put fight for a girlfriend -- No Luck. Vizag Steel Plant Intern. Gajuwaka Theaters rounded off. Lonely Hyundai Internship. Quizzed a lot. Won a number of prizes Quizzing. Made great, great friends (re emphasis). Sweated out hard for grades. Kshitij rocked. Intern Rocked. 'Twas Mall Time at Bangalore. Mysore-Ooty Trip was fun. Gobbled dozens of novels. SitComs on the Lan. BTP Toil. Spent Endless hours in QuizRoom2 -- Guess the Word. Flunked CAT. Landed a Job. Hosted Friends at home. Kalingapatnam beach trip rocked. Treats and Treats and Treats. Had fun. Put fight for a girlfriend -- No Luck. Farewells. Best outgoing Techie. Respect, perhaps. BTP Load again. Awaiting the future.
(to follow....... Last End sems, Grand Viva, B Tech Project presentation)
(in chronological order)

I've laughed and I've cried at times over the years here.
I've consoled and I've been pacified.
I've vented my ire and at times have been at the recieving end of it.
I've felt down and out at times and I've felt exuberant too.
I've worked hard and have also lazed a lot.
I've experienced success as well as failure in equal doses.
But, I've loved every moment of my stay here at IIT, Kharagpur and all that this place has thrown at me and taught me along the way. I wouldn't want to imagine these 4 years having gone by any other way.

Vindication

2008-04-14T23:01:00.010+05:30

April 2005
RK HALL TEA PARTY FOR THE INCOMING BATCH

Screaming Seniors. Their unending devotion for the hall showing. Devotion, teetering on the edge of Jingoism. Endless Gyaan. Speeches and unending Homilies concerning the General Championships, Hall Traditions and Hall Tempo. Chaos and Hullaballoo.

Amidst all this, I can't help but notice the Awards boards perched alongside a portrait of Dr.RadhaKrishnan. And what a difference these boards made to the ambience of the entire place. The entire foyer though rustic, seemed awe-inspiring. I remember standing there reading a few names immortalized on those boards for posterity and I quietly wondered.......

Circa April 2008
RK HALL FAREWELL TO THE OUTGOING BATCH

Best Outgoing Technology Student.
Surprise, Elation, Satisfaction.

A 3 year old dream come true.

It's been one hell of a ride in RK Hall. Thanks for the accolade, mates and this award also futher vindicates my belief that if we discharge our duties to the best of our abilities, the recognition and the adulations will automatically follow.

The plaque besides my Lappy :)

Checkmate

2008-04-10T03:06:00.009+05:30

Ever heard that every relation is a gamble.
Ask me and I'd say it 's more of a chess game than Russian Roulette.

For every relation,
There exists a first move - the opening.(One of them has to do it)
The advantage will lie in the hands of player 1 if he can make an intelligent opening.
Make a faulty opening and you surrender all advantage.
Player 2 can seize the advantage if he can counter attack.
If both don't relent and play hard, you have a stalemate situation.
You got to make sacrifices to ultimately WIN.
To come out unscathed you got to play smart.
Or else you will be CHECKMATED.

Staring down the Abyss

2008-04-09T03:22:00.008+05:30

Hermetic.
Claustrophobic.
Petrified.

Couldn't find "One word" that could embody all that I am feeling right now. The English Lexicon still needs expansion. What's your say???

Just like with every other semester ending, I see humongous deadlines, submissions, exams and coupled with these, the rat race to stay ahead of competition. Just fathom this -- BTP, Grand Viva and EndSems. And with the kind of preparation that I have had so far, it doesn't need a psychiatrist to figure out the state of my mind right now.

Just imagine staring down the Abyss and waiting to take the (inevitable) plunge.

P.S : Did I hear Exequies, anyone???

B'coz

2008-03-29T00:29:00.006+05:30

Not everything is as fine as it seems.
Because beneath that calm exterior might lie a Maelstrom waitin' to explode.

Not every relation is what it appears to be.
Because there still are certain emotions that haven't yet undergone the christening process.

Not everything you've heard is as dulcet as it sounds.
Because there are words that have more than a singular meaning.

Nothing is as patent as evident.
Because you can never be fully sure of anything in LIFE!!!

-- inspired from some scribblings on the walls of Dave's room

I think I maybe beginning to disappear.

2008-03-11T13:23:00.005+05:30

“I think I maybe beginning to disappear.”
–
Fiona in the Movie Away from Her

Ah, What grace Dame Julie Christie!!! How wonderfully well she carries herself through this poignant, touching tale of how an elderly couple deals with Alzheimer’s.

Coming to the point, I found this particular quote very pertinent to our own lives. In the movie, the reference is to her fading memory as a consequence of Alzheimer’s. But I seriously think each one of us metamorphoses into newer selves as we grow over the years – the innocent child in us disappears for the burgeoning of the egotistical megalomaniac, who then further makes way for the venal mercenary and the evolution continues. Each of our selves has a latency period before we begin to grow out of them – at least that’s what I think. Anyways, the point is, I think I maybe beginning to disappear.

Falling Slowly -- Once

2008-03-03T03:32:00.003+05:30

I have just realised that I have the HOTS for soulful haunting melodies. Wow!!! What can be more soothing than a simple and delicately lyricized hummable song........

If you had watched the telecast of the 80th Annual Academy Awards, you’d understand what I exactly want to say. The soulful rendition of “Falling Slowly” from the movie ONCE by the lead performers – Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova – caught my eye(or ear, is it???) and I have been basking in the warmth and the honey dipped innocence of this lovely song. (It’s been blaring from my speakers ever since. :) ) That the song went to win the OSCAR for best song speaks volumes for itself and limits my use of further eloquence. Just listen and enjoy .

2008-02-04T01:10:00.000+05:30

"Whenever a door closes, there's a new one that opens."

It's upto you to find out which one and where. Period.

Placement Chronicles

2008-01-16T11:14:00.002+05:30

November 4

Huge B’day Bash. (Check Flickr for pics) CAT Prep reaching a crescendo.

Your's truly..... :P

November 4 -- SIMShock by IMS

Shocked to the core. Miss the cut offs in all 3 sections by a small margin.

Shivers down the spine. Frustration sets in. Whole CAT preparation appears to be in shambles.

November 13 -- Last SIMCAT
After almost giving up on CAT, this one provides a small ray of hope. Score 40% in each section and end up at 99.5 percentile.

Boosts the morale and lifts up the sagging spirits.

November 20 -- CAT @ Kolkata
The Grand Debacle. Seemed like the worst nightmare. Forget to mark a few answers on the OMR sheet

November 20^th night
2 End Semester Exams the next day and about 10 hours on hand to recuperate from the CAT shock and prepare for them after a rigorous train journey and to catch sleep in the said duration as well.

November 21^st
Abysmal performance in the Systems and Control paper. (Later to be “awarded” my first 'P' grade in Kgp) All the people around me keep scribbling away while I find it hard to navigate the 3 hours time.

Recede into a shell of despair and helplessness. Unable to face myself, my parents and all dreams lie shattered. Self-doubts begin to rise before I quash some of my fears and resolutely decide to get on with LIFE.

December 1^st
Placements get underway at the other IIT’s – Bombay and Chennai. Stats and updates from friends at the other institute augments expectations and creates new apprehensions.

December 2^nd
The day before D-day. Placements to start the next day. Seven companies on Day One. Didn’t apply for Schlums, McKinsey(Sure that I wouldn’t be shortlisted). Couldn’t get through Deutsche Bank’s Written test and Capital One’s written test too (This one was a surprise). Not shortlisted in Lehmann Brothers. (Most still can’t fathom why they didn’t get shortlisted) That left me shortlisted in ITC(CG based) and Procter & Gamble (After a written test followed by an online Psychometric Analysis). Assure myself that I can do well and that the fewer companies would mean lesser pressure.

December 3^rd D-Day
ITC GD starts at 12. Perform reasonably well in the GD. Was a relatively straightforward Case Study. 2 females in my group keep snubbing the others and are very keen to voice their opinions. I raise a few valid points and come out quite satisfied with my performance.

P&G calls me for the first interview at 2:00. 45 minutes of HR interview. Was asked endless experiences to quote – like situations where I worked in a group, solved inter personal problems, where my idea was applauded, my this and my that. The interviewer appears mighty pleased with my answers and I can see a smile across his face. Just get the feeling that P&G might actually........

Not shortlisted for ITC interviews. Justified given that they were looking at the whole package and having about 4 people ahead on the CG scale from the same branch didn’t help either. Still had one more interview to go, at P&G and I wanted to concentrate on that.

4 hours since my first interview at P&G and I’m still not called on for my 2^nd while I can see people who’ve come after me finish both their interviews and leave. Why I wasn't called etc. aren't the stuff meant for open discussion and the reasons are best left unsaid.

Reach my room – dead tired and exhausted – and I take a quick nap. Suddenly I get a call from P&G calling me for my 2^nd interview. A new hope glimmers. I suddenly get dressed into my formals and rush on my cycle. The first interviewer was visibly pleased seeing me and I’m sure he was the one that called me back. The 2^nd interview was drag – It was the last interview of day one and the interviewers had to abandon their dinner and interview me. Even I was drowsy and dazed & by that time I was visibly displeased with P&G. I did not expect to make it through P&G nor did I actually want to be placed there.

End of Day Zero

December 4^th Day One
DE Shaw, ZS Associates, Inductis and Fair Isaac.

DE Shaw test early in the morning. S/W section was hardcore. The algorithm section and Math were a breeze.

ZS Group Discussion at 11. With the risk of sounding too preposterous, I felt that I was the best participant in the group and easily deserved to be through.

I move over to Fair Isaac where I get to know I was shortlisted for Quality Assurance Profile. So I decide to take off from there.

Inductis interviews start. Hardcore Puzzles and Probability – Not my cuppa tea. Yet I do reasonably well. Each interview takes one and a half hour. Its 4:00 by the time two interviews are up.

Get to know ZS ditched me. (Maybe I shouldn’t have told them I had 3 other companies that day) On expected lines, DE Shaw doesn’t shortlist me either.

I get a call from FAIR ISAAC and with me running out of options, I move there and 4:30 begins my first interview. The interviewer asks me to describe about myself and I do well. He then peruses my resume and asks me about my role in Quizzing at Kgp. Then he proceeds to ask me a few questions –similar to a rapid fire round with 15 questions hurled at me in just over a minute. I answer them all.

Nokia’s country of Origin. It’s earlier business. History behind the name Adidas, Motorola. About Puma. About IBM. The next question I get -- “What’s your IQ???”

That instant I knew I was through. I asked for a change in the profile, (I’m glad I asked that) which he obliged. Then a few more questions on algorithms and puzzles. Then another small interview with algos and puzzles.

I move back to Inductis and again make the cardinal sin of informing the interviewer that I was almost through FI. This time the interview gets real real hard. The interviewer is sure I would ditch his company over FI and instead, he dumps me.

So finally I’m down to the end of day one and I’ve Fair Isaac offering me a software job. I call up home and they want me to take the first job offered to me.

I move over to FI and complete my other 2 interviews which were mere formalities and proceed to accept their offer.

Still in a daze and tired from the 2 day strain, I head back to my room. News trickles to my wingies that I’m placed. Congratulatory messages all around. It wasn’t how I’d expected it to be.

No triumphant displays of victory. No heart warming celebrations. No howling. No joyous screams. No sense of Accomplishment. Just Listlessness. Languor. Totally Energy Sapped. Just a bundle of relief. A huge sense of relief that I don't have to get my formals washed again, better, not wear them again for some time.

2 harrowing days. Zillions of lessons learnt. A Huge Humbling Experience. With a bittersweet ending.

I just inform my parents and my best friend that I’m placed. Only 2 or 3 days after the feeling seeps in, I call up all my friends and inform them.

December 8^th – January 2^nd
Festive atmosphere at home. Some of my dearest friends from KGP come over to my place and we have a gr8 time.

Dad & Mom take great pride in announcing the news to the World. But I’m already looking forward to the CAT results and prepare my parents to accept the worst.

January 8^th -- CAT results
As expected, my marks aren’t anywhere near the cut offs. But then surprisingly – mostly to my surprise—I take the results particularly well. No bad feelings. Just learning from my mistakes and hope to do well the next time I give CAT. Also decide to give my GMAT.

Life balances everything, I guess.
Victories and Defeats.
Joys and Sorrows.

How intriguing is the Flow of Life. We just need to go along with it. Right now, I'd like to believe whatever is bestowed upon us by LIFE is what actually is best suited for us. Period.

Orkut!!!

2007-12-29T12:14:00.000+05:30

Keeping a TAB on people you love/admire........ or is it STALKING???

Jobless No More :D

2007-12-06T01:11:00.000+05:30

The WAIT was worth it.
"Fair"Isaac it is!!!
And Bangy of all Places :)
Couldn't have asked for more...............

P.S : 24 hrs since FI has offered me the job(that too on Day 1) and the feeling has not fully sunk in. I wanna jump up and down and howl and scream at the top of my voice. More in my next post.

Read My Mind

2007-11-07T19:18:00.000+05:30

Ceaseless Doubts. Vacillating Thoughts.
Last Minute Hiccups. Scares and Alarms.
Puerile Distractions. Shaken Convictions.
Panic set in. Turmoil within.
Ego Deflated. As the Final Ride Begins.

Summoning Courage. Beckoning Calm.
I ride ahead. Weathering the Storm.

Under the Realization,
that the Outcome doesn't matter,
Once you've done your part!!!

Gyaan

2007-10-17T19:55:00.001+05:30

Disclaimer: The opinions presented herewith are entirely born out of experience – a few experienced by self and a few from what I've seen from a distance. Anybody with a differing opinion is welcome. I do not expect total consensus nor do I want to thrust my ideology through anybody's throat. Just some random musings -- all unrelated, incoherent and insane.

We are unaware that we are lying almost half the time we fib. Half the time we do not know we are lying because we warp the truth so much in our own mind.

The Human Psyche is analogous to a balloon. Blow and it inflates. Also, poke it with a tiny pin and the whole bubble deflates.

No human is ever so gracious to completely forgive another of his transgressions. How much ever one tries to forgive and forget, at the back of one’s head keep nagging those lapses.

Solitude is an absolute godsend. Though people get desolate and forlorn after a while, it gives great scope for introspection – to assess oneself and to figure out who one really is and what one really plans to do.

Every man has an unknown feminine side to him. How much of it he manages to tap surely determines how far he can get into a woman’s life.

What you have been wallowing in for a long time, you do not realize its true worth. Whatever’s out of reach is what you actually crave for.

Pick up 10 random words from a word list and categorize them into +ve and –ve based on what they convey. You’ll most probably end up with a 3:7 ratio.

P.S: Not written while in a melancholic disposition. Better termed sober or even vacuous would be apposite.

Exam Induced Rest

2007-09-30T18:40:00.000+05:30

I sure want to write about lots of stuff. But then, I really wonder if there is no time at all to pen down a few thoughts......

After the rigors of a MidSem Examination, I cannot think of anything else but rest the mind and give it some respite -- it deserves that I guess. As regards my performance, maybe the exams were just mediocre in every sense of the word but then I racked my brains damn hard and hence the well deserved breather.

P.S : Rest included completing 2 seasons of 'How I met your mother' -- Awesome Barney
A few P G Wodehouse Shorties -- Great Humour, Great Writing
Lil' bit of Freakonomics -- I haven't completed it yet :O
Scanning for new sitcoms -- Ventured into WonderYears, Joey, Gossip Girl, Rules of Engagement but honestly, I didn't like any.
Rummaging for Modern Rock Songs
And then hours and hours together on ''Quizroom2" on DC++ -- Awesome Place for Vocab enthusiasts. Whoa!!! This place rocks.

And here's a cute lil' game on the net I've been playin'.

I'd better get back to completing the code I'd have to submit tomorrow for the Evolutionary Computing Lab {Trust me, the course is as boring as the course name sounds interesting}. And btw, Rest Time's Over.

2007-09-22T02:52:00.000+05:30

Nothing's goin' right

2007-08-26T02:56:00.000+05:30

-- A switch in the LAN box trips and the whole wing is mired in darkness ( I mean disconnected from the rest of the world) for one whole week :O No mails, no DC++, no quizroom. For my wingies there is no Orkut, no CS, no AOE. It's worse than being starved.
-- It's my project guide's course and I turn up without doing my assignment. I botch up something clumsily on paper, create a few equations out of thin air, as he arrives checking. He notices the gibberish in my notebook and displays a stern face. What does that mean???
-- I do a little project work on my comp and the comp seems to have aged. Running a slightly cumbersome image conversion program crashes the system and restarts involuntarily. Should I get myself a laptop???
-- I meet my project guide almost after a gap of 20 days and all he says is "Keep meeting me now and then man."
-- I meet my guide for the 4th time in almost a week and he mistakes my aim at redemption for wanting more work and dumps a huge project onto me. What a pity!!! Now I have to work atleast 6 hours a week in the lab. Thank God, it's still coding that I get to do.
-- The first simulated CAT exam and I mess up while blackening the ovals on the OMR sheet.
-- The LAN starts working after a week and I open my inbox to find it empty :O
-- I take up a tag by TF and once Scribefire crashes and the other time the computer reboots for no reason. Rewrote it again from scratch.

Life's turning out quite Crazy. Huge workload and confusing schedules. Priorities keep changing by the minute. I do not know what to do.
I hate my life. Period. As I was telling mom the other day, 96 hours a day still wouldn't suffice to get me complete my work.
And again, I haven't been this busy in years. So I guess I am enjoying it as well. I love my life. How Ironic is that??? Or how much more INSANE can I get???

Music It is

2007-08-26T02:29:00.000+05:30

Another tag by The twilightfairy
This time its about music.

1. Which song is being played in your mind right now?

“You were my everything” by Aviation.
I’ve heard this one over 60 times today. So what else could blare in my head right at this instant?

2. One song that describes your life…. (no self made compositions please)

“Patience” by Take That
“Bad Day” by Daniel Powter
“Chasing Cars” by Snow Patrol
“Trouble Sleeping” by The Perishers
“It ends tonight” by The All American Rejects
“It’s not Over” by Daughtry

Life’s so byzantine and convoluted that to encapsulate it within one song would be entirely out of question. So maybe the assortment here might paint a faint sketch of me. It’s got more to do with feel and the mood of the songs than with the lyrics....

3.The song you listen to most on your Ipod/Mp3 player/Cell/PC etc…

Most songs have a relatively short shelf-life when it comes to me. I listen repeatedly to a song until it isn’t fresh anymore or until I find another one. Poor “Dave”, who unfortunately is my neighbour, has to endure the same song repeatedly blaring from my speakers – mostly I use the repeat mode. Like it is “You were my everything” from Aviation today, “Paas Aaya Kyon” last week, Rihanna’s “Umbrella” the week before that and “Laare Choote” sometime in April ;)

But then there are those that surpass all boundaries and are a pleasure to the ears. These are the few that I turn to when I am down and out and need to rejuvenate, when I am happy and want to feel exuberant, when I am dismal and want to feel better and sometimes fro no reason at all. A few such that I can recollect right at this instant, I’ll mention below.

“Iris” –Goo Goo Dolls
“Hero” – Enrique Iglesias
“The Reason” - Hoobastank
“You’re Beautiful” - James Blunt
“Dream On” – Aerosmith
“Words” – Boyzone
“Hotel California” – Eagles
“Stairway to Heaven” – Led Zeppelin
“When you say nothing at all” – Ronan Keating
“Thank You” – Dido
“Diary of Jane” – Breaking Benjamin
“Horse with no name” –Americans
“Late GoodBye” – Poets of the Fall
“So Sick of Love songs” – Ne-Yo as well as the female version
“Wonderwall” - Oasis

Guess, I’d better stop here and move on.

4. A song that best describes the following days in your life.

School/College Days –“Summer of ’69” by Bryan Adams. Nothing else strikes my memory when you say school days. The selection is self explanatory.

Love – haven’t experienced it. So I’ll just quote the most romantic songs I’ve heard.
“Nothing in the world” by Atomic Kitten
“She’s Everything” by Brad Paisley. The lovely lyrics epitomize the perfect girlfriend I guess. I might be wrong, though.

Mood right now – “Colorblind” by Darius. Confused yet feels fine. Replace the girl in the song with workload.

5. Your all time favourite song, and the reason for it... maybe some memory/ some funny story/etc!!!
“Yeh Haseen Waadiyaan” from Roja
Rehman’s first and his best.

I remember singing this in some compulsory singing competition in school(must have been in class IV then) and amazingly ended up being selected for the school choir.

6. A song u wish u hadn't heard!!! (more than one is always a pleasure!!!)
Him(s)hesh Reshammiya -- No second thoughts on that.
Man!!! Is he a pain in the arse???

On a trip from Mysore to Ooty the driver couldn’t seem to get enough of him and we had to endure the songs all along the 6 hour trip and no prizes for guessing who ended up with a headache.

7. A song that would best describe..... Me[twilightfairy]
(Hey, I took pains to tag u, I guess I deserve this ;-) )
I do not know much about you. Everything I know about you is from reading the posts on your blog. So you maybe just come across as sweet and nice.
I am tempted to say “Angel of the Morning” by The Pretenders ;)

But then let me go with this lovely piece – “The Mass” by Era. Note the aura in the song.

8. If you were in an elevator with Himesh Reshammiya and Altaf Raja, you would..........
Murder Himesh by slitting his throat. Or cut off his nose, so he further can’t sing. Altaf doesn’t bother me that much.

Now to further tag somebody, I'd like to see Dave(my music GURU) write a similar one as and when he starts his blog. For now 'Rampage' I tag.

Roger Federer -- The Artist

2007-08-02T20:50:00.002+05:30

I'd been wanting to write something about Federer for quite some time now. But then, With my limited vocab, I feared I would just be belittling the sublime artistry of the wonderful champion. His mind-numbing repertoire and arsenal of shots, his ability to change gears in a jiffy, his on court cool, calm and collected disposition, his amazing handling of pressure situations, his off court charity works, his body language and attitude, his respect for the legends as well as his peers, the humour and humility preset in his press conferences, his striking looks, his gorgeous smile...... Ooh!!! I can go on and on.

But then before I say anything more about the master, all his greatness is encompassed in this absolutely wonderful NIKE Ad. With a voice over by Tiger Woods and the absolutely apt music, this ad has been one of the best I have seen over the years. The twist at the end makes it all the more worthwhile.

P.S : For all the Nadal fans and Sampras aficionados, I truly admire them both too. Let's not compare Sampras and Federer. They were the best of their generation. How they would have fared if pitted against each other in their primes is just fodder for speculation. And Nadal is undoubtedly the best clay courter ever and might catch up with Federer very soon on the other surfaces as well. Love his fighting spirit.

Hmmmph.....

2007-07-25T08:44:00.000+05:30

Yaay!!! The Competitive Streak in ME is still alive !!!

Alas, the Hardworking Me is Dead. Period.

P.S: Sadly True :(
I need a kick in the arse to get me started.
Dude,Wake Up!!!

The Impregnable Fortress

2007-07-20T22:16:00.001+05:30

Another semester has arrived and we are back to the customary routine. How easily we slip into the routine after a lazy holiday still astounds me.

Just like every other semester, this one too promises to be a harbinger of many good things, nay great things -- I am just required to put in the requisite hard work. Pronouncing this sem the key to my entire future would be making an understatement. With my GRE scheduled for October and then CAT for November followed by the Placement season all December, this one promises to be a make or break sem. My entire future hinges on these few months ahead.

So for now, all I am doing is HOPE -- hope that everything turns out right. Here I can't refrain from this inspirational quote from one of my favourite movies of all time, The Shawshank Redemption -- Andy Dufresne's immortal lines to Red.

"Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies."

So, as I sign off with Hope, wish me luck, my friends, in my endeavours.

Song in the background : Umbrella by Rihanna feat. Jay-Z

P.S: Oops!!! I almost forgot. The title......
The Impregnable Fortress = a 9 point SGPA
This is something that I have come so close to achieving the last two sems but one which still conveniently eludes me. I still have 2 more shots at it though-- still it feels a lil' painful having 'just' missed the mark, twice at that.

The 8RF Game...

2007-07-11T01:53:00.002+05:30

I've been tagged by Twilight Fairy....

Here are the rules:

1.Players start with 8 random facts about themselves.
2.Those who are tagged should post these rules and their 8 random facts.
3.Players should tag 8 other people and notify them they have been tagged.

Now that I have had my fill of "lazing and relaxing" after the rigours of the last fortnight of my intern, it's time to return to the usual mode of life. Any more lazing around and I will just be boring myself to death. So here goes 8 random facts about me.

1. Last 7 days Liquid Consumption Stats

Aerated Drinks (Coke/Thums Up/Appy Fizz) -- 22 bottles (500ml each or is it 600???)
(Just back after counting the bottles heap in the kitchen)
Water -- Hardly 2 such bottles.

Me on a lonely island with an unlimited supply of softdrinks -- I'm sure I can make it through.
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2. I seriously believe that my favourite sporting heroes are jinxed when I watch them live.
Like the only ball of the 2003 cricket WC tournament that I watched live, Sachin Tendulkar was out to Shoaib Akhtar. I sauntered to the television room when he was on the verge of his century and then it was all over!!! :(
Federer lost the French Open 2006 while I watched it live and Schumi's engine blew in the Japanese GP last year denying him his rightful title.
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3. I suppose I am low on self esteem. I deride myself a huge deal in front of others. I seriously do not know if I consider myself a weaker earthling than the person(s) in front or if the derision I heap on myself is a result of my insecurity and fear of failure.
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4. I am a loner. Being an only child, I have no idea as to what it feels like having a brother or a sister. I long to be pampered. I wish to pamper someone and feel protective about that person. I seriously wish I had a brother or a sister. But then again, being an only child always comes attached with lots of goodies -- and so I'm not complaining too much.
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5. I don't know if this is normal. But I have never had any crushes all my life -- be it cine stars, classmates or whoever whatever.
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6. I used to be a sucker for marks. Topping the class was all I used to think of and subsequently put a lot of pressure on myself.
I was always the topper of my class until I set foot in the rarefied hallows of IIT -- where I broke free off my self imposed shackles and topping the class has never been on my agenda since.
I still remember vividly the incident when I scored 16 1/4 marks in Telugu during a unit test and my competitors for the first rank scored 16 3/4 marks in the same. I cried so badly for the half mark they'd gained on me, that I threw up in the class, much to the embarrassment of the teacher and myself.
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7. My last year of stay at Kharagpur will be the 17th year of hostel life for me. 17 of 21. That's a huge number, I guess. I'd bet I have seen a huge array of people than the average person and the whole melange of characters from the motley crowd that has passed by me has made me quite worldly wise.
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8. I write long e-mails and long letters -- but the recipients haven't ever complained about their length.
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Whoooo!!! Didn't know I had to slog out so hard at that one.
And finding 8 more people :O
Well, let's save that for another day.

Oh.... Wow O Wow !!!

2007-06-14T10:07:00.000+05:30

This feels real good. A Huge Morale Booster especially at a time when I am pondering at all the unwise steps I took during the course of my life.

The Outlook-CNN-IBN poll places IIT Kharagpur back at the Num ero Uno position in the Engineering College rankings. Back to the top. I still remember those message T-shirts junta used to flaunt when I was in my first year, proudly proclaiming, "IIT Kgp....Lonely at the Top" . Then there was the fall from grace!!! Slowly the tees vanished too.

I still cannot comprehend how these rankings are done and how the jugglery of the top 5 IIT's can happen in the rankings each year when there isn't much of a change in the way each IIT functions. Maybe just a little bit of infrastructure addition -- which appears to be of the same magnitude in all the IIT's because they have very similar fund allocations. How much ever the rankings and the ranking system may puzzle me, it is so refreshing to see my dear insti back at the top of the ladder. All I needed was a reason to move out of the gloominess and what better reason than this. Has pepped up my spirits and got me kicking.

Addendum: As if one isn't sufficient, here goes another--The Dataquest Rankings where IIT Kgp again tops the charts. :)

Further Snippets -- Bangalore Life

2007-06-01T11:50:00.000+05:30

Today signals the completion of 4 weeks(that's one half of my expected stay) of my work here @ Tata ELXSI, the -- The odd Elxsi is a Singaporean company that ventured into a joint venture with the Tata's and then slipped off into oblivion, but the name sounding different and maybe, posh, hung on. Considering the fact that at almost exactly the same time of the year last year, I was wriggling and writhing to get out of Vizag Steel Plant and Hyundai Motors India Ltd, painfully counting the days left out of the 3 week and 2 week schedule respectively, this is a huge huge improvement given that I am looking forward to the next 4 weeks. Great going, I must say.
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Weekends have gotten so stereotypical what with Bangalore having just malls, malls and more malls, and mind you, nothing else. It's Saturday and so we rush to the Inox theater @ Garuda Mall, to catch a 10:00 AM show. That's the only show on the weekends available for less than a 100 bucks, 99 to be exact. Venture out in the afternoon and the rates escalate to 200. Now don't count me out for being a miser, but then I simply don't think it's worth it spending 200 bucks on a movie -- a gamble on 2 or more precious hours of your life without the surety that you wouldn't run a headache at the end of it all.
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After the movie, we are off to some restaurant and after that, we lazily roam about the streets before hitting another mall, where a Landmark or a Crossword consumes most of our time. Ah!!! Bliss it is to spend some time in the company of books, wanting to buy this and that and everything. Reading a few passages from those that you happen to lay your eyes on and getting the mind into a fix deciding as to which book to take along with you to provide companionship and solace for the week and which to discard for some other time.
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After I reach back home in the night after some frantic window shopping at the malls, its time to hit the bed. Sundays, I mostly have some carried over work from office. So Sunday is for a little bit of rest at home and spending time with "F.R.I.E.N.D.S" and Seinfeld.
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Last week, we'd been to see 'Cheeni Kum' -- the best romantic comedy ever made in Hindi. Awesome dialogues, Characters one could so easily relate to, Sharp witted humour matched with great performances by the cast. Go watch it -- You'll love the jokes on chhatris and chachas, few scenes that will linger in your head for a long, long time. Though I must admit the second half was bland, boring and not even half as energy filled as the first one. Well, you have to admit though, you can't not have some dramabaazi and expect a saccharine comedy all through. It has to meander to an end somewhere. This week, its Pirates of the Caribbean.
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Last Sunday, The outgoing batch of 2001 of St John's, Gannavaram had a get together, a reunion. And guess who was missing??? Yours truly, Me!!! Oh!!! How I missed not being able to go there. I was working on my presentation for Monday when guys called up and talked to me. I was completely put off-- mood out -- for 2 hours and had to roll up in my cot to get that bad feeling out. Seeing the photos on the group makes me more jealous. Guess all of them had a jolly good time. Pesky Little Brats, all grown-ups now -- Miss you all so much.
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Coming to the HUGEST thing that happened to me at my workplace. My first BIG presentation in office. Note the keyword -- BIG. BIG doesn't exactly capture the magnitude of vastness, the hugeness of the presentation. It was colossal in many ways. Highly designated people among the audience. (Huge Play of Nerves on my part. You'd expect that naturally. Slipped on fine into my presenter's role after the first 2 minutes.) Twitched eyebrows. Stoic expressions. Questions all over in the air. Suggestions flew thick and fast. Scampered solutions. (I had to make up many, on-the-spot.) It was more of a brainstorming session that went on for 2 hours. And at the end of it all, all I had was lot of feedback, little bit of appreciation and much more work to do.
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CGPA, Cumulative Grade Point Average, and SGPA, Semester Grade Point Average, are huge depressants, I learnt yesterday. I was thinking about these after a long long time and the very mention of those dreaded words sent shivers down my spine. I could no more do any work. It spilled into a headache and I had to take permission yesterday to take the afternoon off -- I had the feeling that my head was about to burst from pressure. How my life revolves around my CGPA at this instant. Which brings me back to the cliched phrase -- How I wish I knew it's importance the moment I entered IIT.
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Finished Reading
The Namesake by Jhumpa Lahiri -- Great insight into NRI life. Quite moving at the end. Sluggish Pace but quite lovable and enjoyable.
Eleven Minutes by Paulo Coelho -- The only one to write like he can, where the author uses the story of a prostitute as a metaphor to bring out the difference between love and sex. And there is a lot more one can get from it.
The Great Indian Novel by Shashi Tharoor -- enjoyable at first but then flip past the initial 100 pages and it gets monotonous and 'Awww!!! Please Stop', you'd hear yourself say. He marries the Mahabharata with the British Raj -- and the funniness reaches a yielding point very soon, turning itself to torture.
The Inheritance of Loss by Kiran Desai -- needs a bigger review. Maybe when I am out of this intern, I'll write a review. Winner of the Man Booker Prize 2006. And I have many interesting observations about it.
The Nude by Nergis Dalal -- It's a collection of short stories. Crappy book and Sick in many senses. (nothing porno about it -- just a few sick stories on relationships.)

Currently Reading
Above Average -- by Amitabha Bagchi, an IIT professor writing about an IITian. (Guess it's semi-autobiographical.)
120 days of Sodom -- by Marquis De Sade, the man responsible for the birth of the eponym - Sadism. (e-book)

In the shelf
To Kill a Mocking Bird -- by Harper Lee. I'd been wanting to read this one in a long, long time.
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Before I sign off, I must remind myself. One hour of Office time in writing my memoirs -- Who's gonna read them anyways??? I just like the freedom I enjoy at the workplace here. Hoping to have a great weekend. Auf Widerschen until then.

Time Flies!!!

2007-05-14T14:48:00.000+05:30

More than a month since my last post!!!
Guess I have been procrastinating a lot. But then putting of things for a later date has become a way of life, I guess. I do have so many things to yap about, though.

-- Like I want to talk about the awfully-gone-wrong End semester exams, where I'd expected one thing and what appeared in the paper was another.

-- Like my 1 week stay at home, where each day I'd had to brave things that I'd get to hear, hidden away safely from me all through a semester so that it doesnt affect my stay at IIT.

-- Like I want to talk about my addiction to sitcoms especially Seinfeld as well as Two and a Half men. Like I want to write a post on the awesome and frighteningly witty one-liners in 2.5 men. Sample this -- "Love isn't blind. It's retarded!!!" :P

-- Like my developing cold feet to travel for my summer internship from my hometown to Bangalore on a unconfirmed AC 2 tier ticket.

-- Like my hodgy podgy trip the next day , this time, on a half confirmed ;), yes you heard it right, half confirmed, sleeper class ticket.

-- Like my waiting for my brother to pick me up at the Bangalore station and he awaiting a call from me announcing my arrival, thus resulting in my being stranded on the platform for atleast an hour or so.

-- Like my workplace here at TATA ELXSI, the energy sapping workplace, busy and reticent people all around my workstation, the workaholics adjacent my cabin, demanding superiors and an altogether different lifestyle that I've accustomed myself to.

-- Like the 20 minute drive from office to the bus stop and the 30 minute walk from the bus stop to my brother's place. Crazy!!! Ain't it???

-- Like the excruciatingly difficult "loner" times I have to spend in the evenings - immersing myself in novels, waiting for my brother to get back home so that we can have dinner together.

-- Like the interesting design project I have been assigned with - to design a kitchen cabinet with an easily accessible bottom rack, so that you wouldn't need to bend down and hurt your hips. (My mudhead is awaiting some sudden spark. But I must confess it hasn't been in working mode for the past 3 years. So you guys could help me through this. Any ideas welcome here :D)

-- Like my spending the first week trying to bypass proxies to access google and yahoo mail and sports sites that are blocked in office. (Successfully managed that in the end!!! Yippeeee :B)

-- Like I want to talk about how much I loved the first half of the movie 'Life in a METRO'. WOW !!! Sizzling, Scandalous and Unabashed Concoction of Extra Marital Affairs. Enough material to ponder over how westernized we have become and hopefully questioning whether we have crossed the line or not.

-- Like how I felt very bad for "Gogol" of "The Namesake", especially in the concluding pages. Something made my heart heavy, sorrow engulfing both the auricles and ventricles -- Feeling bad for his having to be emotionally and physically torn between two continents, for having had 4 failed relations, for not really understanding who he is and what he is meant to be.

-- Like walking around malls, window shopping with nothing in mind - gazing at Swarovski, drooling over Tag Hueur and desiring that slim piece of IPod Nano.

-- Like I want to comment about the artificial Bangalore life, the dullness that hangs in the air and the confused looks on the faces of many. One thing Bangalore has managed to do to me is feel insecure about not having a girlfriend. :P Guess that feel surfaces in anyone when in a crowd of 100 there are 40 couples at the very least!!!

So much to talk about. So little time. If I don't get back to work now, I'd be lagging behind on my schedule. Got a presentation to make this Thursday -- my first deliverable here. So back I go to work. Ciao............

P.S : Yooooo :D My first post from OFFICE!!! Deserves a celebration and a Pat!!!

Candid Confessions -- Have I hit NADIR???

2007-04-07T17:23:00.001+05:30

>>---> Unenthusiastic(adj)
apathetic, indifferent, unresponsive, lukewarm, half-hearted, subdued, cool, unimpressed, unexcited, uninterested

No GRE Preparation that one. 'Twas my status message in Gtalk a few days back!!!

Have you ever felt so damn tied down with work and yet felt like you don't really want to move a finger but just relax??? If you'd ever felt that way, you would understand what my status was trying to convey. When a friend who was online asked me what I was up to, I quickly lamented "No work" while I actually meant, "Lots of work to do, dude, but zilch tempo".

Well, Sample My Workload -- 2 Term Papers, 1 B Plan submission, 1 Project Report, 3 Class Tests and One Huge MATLAB Program all in the span of a week. All I do is sit in front of computer doing absolutely random crap or loiter around the corridor just hoping the mood to complete (or start) the work just pops out of nowhere. Wonder how that's feasible??? I need someone to fix my mind. Anyone out there to help fix it???

>>---> One of my childhood pals reminded me the other day how down in the dumps and sulky I have been behaving of late. He says “You’ve put a plug to all your humour channels."(Wonder if I had one in the first place, though the way he was talking, he meant I had many :D) "Creativity is an offspring of humour", he goes on. So he says he notices a dearth of creativity and humour in all my actions, writings and thoughts..... I just sighed. He at least meant I had been funny and witty and creative for some part of my life.

>>---> I used to pride myself over having a strong memory..... Well, Not anymore!!! I was in a quiz the last week when a few questions I'd heard before popped up. However hard I tried, I couldn't just recall the answers. Just as the quiz master gave out the answer, I'd gasp and let out a "Ptch....Shit, I knew this. Should have got it". Damn!!!

>>---> My tummy's looking like it's going to explode. Well, what else do you expect when you gorge twice a day at the very many Nescafe outlets that have mushroomed in the campus? This puff, That sandwich, This tart, That muffin and what not, finally washed down with a refreshingly chilled Ice Tea. No lunch, No supper in our rotten mess. Just Nescafe!!! My taste buds are having a blast while my pockets are getting blasted..... Damn big hole I can see already.

POWER is like doing DRUGS

2007-03-31T17:46:00.001+05:30

"Power tends to corrupt.
Absolute power Corrupts absolutely."

Just the slightest hint of power seems to set off a chemical reaction in the head of any/every person bestowed with it. It's hard to stay away from sinning as a result of that "Chemical Locha". Even if it is just trivial powers you have, I'd bet, it is insanely impossible to prevent yourself from nepotism, swindling as well as quite hard maintaining a docile head all through.

Power is like doing drugs.
Once you've had little, you want more.
Once you've had it, you're no more YOU.

The past few months, I've accidentally stumbled upon seemingly innocuous and nice people -- I'd have vouched for their sincerity and steadfastness before they were in power --, being the cause of some astonishingly unimaginable acts, after power had been thrust on them. Power can change most people -- 180 degree the persona changes. One just can't help.

Those already corrupt and knowing the privileges power carries along with it go to any depths to possess it. I don't want to get any controversial but then a respectable college going guy cleaning seniors' plates for being a part of a committee of 20 people. Just Yuck!!! It's so demeaning oneself. Surely there must be better ways of making it to the destination. And if there aren't any, it only means that the system is highly flawed and needs a change.

So those of you who have mistakenly stumbled upon this and might assume "Power" in the near future -- Just review your self every now and then once you get the clout in your hands and please do keep the degree of nepotism, swindling and all that down to the bare minimum and more importantly, you would do with a sane head on your shoulders, because as I already emphasized power corrupts anybody -- You, Me or Anybody else on Planet Earth.

P.S: Power hasn't spared me either. Being the SPL (School Pupil Leader) in my class 10, I used to favour my friends in many aspects -- guilty on several charges of nepotism.

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Peace of Mind

2007-03-26T03:09:00.001+05:30

Life offers some funny twists along it's path. It's imperative that life doesn't provide everything on a platter but then little do we realize that very fact. Of late, the innumerable twists and turns that have engulfed my life have left me bewildered.

I have been befuddled with a stream of such nasty twists -- never before did I witness such a sudden spurt of tricky situations. At first, it seemed kind of awkward. Then, to add to that, my reactions to these intricacies defied all logic. Maybe the shocking nature of these petty convolutions agitated me and pretty upset me leading to those diverse, extreme, unsolicited responses.

I haven't been the same since. Lost in Thoughts.

So many questions float in the air. Concentration has been wavering since. So the march begins to set things right.

Before I attempt putting things back on the right track, I still have many unanswered questions.

What is it that I want ???
What have I set out to achieve???
What will be the aftermath of my decisions???

Nothing is clear. Yet I am determined. I don't want trivial unimportant issues to ruin the big picture.

Still in the elusive search for PEACE OF MIND...........

So Sweet

2007-03-11T20:35:00.001+05:30

Someone just told me something so very sweet!!! So very adoring and so very cute!!! Yeah, actually something about me............, yes ME !!!

It is moments like this that brighten up my Life and make it worthwhile. Suddenly makes me realize somebody does appreciate me for what I am and for what I have been.... And Thank You so very much for livening up my everything and assuring that I am not all that bad a person I conjure myself to be!!! More importantly, letting me know what you feel..........

Sounds Cliched. Can't help. Too excited right now............

P.S : Typed out a few hours back. Delayed posting it on the blog.

MASS BUNK

2007-03-08T16:10:00.004+05:30

Finally!!!
My first MASS BUNK in Kgp. And it's taken 3 years. 3 long years.
Feels good. Feels I've(We've) achieved something. And I seriously don't understand why I am feeling that way.

We had our ED(Engineering Drawing) Lab of our Machine Design Course scheduled at 14:00hrs today. Most of us were in the drawing room(our lab) by around 14:10hrs. The professor arrived at 14:20hrs and wrote down a screwjack design problem on the board. He then proceeded to give some instructions and then left us with work on our hands and said he'd be back after sometime. Not one of us had a smidgen of an idea as to what was to be done regards the problem. 5 minutes passed.... and everyone of us was out of the room, sipping coffee at the Nescafe outlet. Another 5 minutes later everyone was on their way back to the room. I guess, as I type this stuff out, the professor must have just gone back to the room to see our progress. Would like to have a look at his expression for once!!!
It might not be quite right to feel so exhilarated but then most of my friends in non-IIT colleges do boast of having mass bunked very many classes. So now I got something to speak of when they begin to brag about bunking and mass bunking. Maybe my animation right now stems from my having attained those bragging rights as well.

On a totally unconnected note, I broke my spectacles yesterday while practicing for the Inter-Hall Basketball tourney. That reminds me, I was detected with myopia when I was in class 4. I've been wearing spectacles since.
I hated my glasses in the beginning. They actually brought on many nicknames and I hated my glasses for bringing me such misery. But I grew used to them(both the glasses and the nicks) and gradually started loving my specs. I can't imagine a day without them. (Yeah, I can't see anything without them for sure ;) I just wanted to put that differently.) I love them.
I had 2 spares ready. And while I was digging my cupboard and bags for the spares, I found 2 other broken ones as well as a pair of contacts to go with my spares. I haven't used contacts just for the reason that I need to feel some weight on my nose. I've become so very used to spectacles. Love you. So now I have 3 glasses for repair. Whoa!!!

Another thing I'd read just recently and wanted to share here -- This article in IIT-B's student paper. Most IITians will surely find some common chord with the feelings of the author. At least, I felt quite bitter while I was reading this. You might not agree upon wholly with what he says, but then it would be rather foolish to discard all of what he states as being ridiculous and trashy. According to me, the system does need a change -- both the professors and the students as well. A lot of mindsets need to be changed as well and drastically at that.

Varied Hues of Life !!!

2007-03-04T19:39:00.001+05:30

Life is so colourful. My saying that wouldn't be much of a surprise, given today is Holi -- The festival soaked with colours and to me, more the festival of freeing the spirit and revelling in the joy of it.

It's my 3rd Holi here at Kgp and maybe that was why I wasn't so very enthusiastic about it this year. So were a few other friends who'd, I might say become used to hullabaloo surrounding the event every year. So with kind of dampened spirits we just strode out, got our shirts torn (This time my shorts were spared however) and had a few photos taken. Mild Fun, I must say!!!

If Holi wasn't that fabulous, then why was I ranting about Life being so colorful??? Well, it has to do with the various other happenings in my life. And don't be mislead. Colourful doesn't always need to mean groundbreaking achievements or shout aloud stories. Just having had a myriad of emotions to go through and also a mix of events taking place made me wonder truly how varied, multi-layered and multi-coloured LIFE was turning out to be.

This summer, am headed to TATA ELXSI, Bangalore for my 2 month summer internship. It wasn't my preferred destination in any case but then that was the best intern in Bangalore that my CG could garner me. How I finally got to choose ELXSI can form the basis for another post -- a long story. There were just four guys ahead of me on the CG basis and four of them grabbed all the companies in Bangalore that paid heavily. Heights of BAD LUCK, you can say!!! Am Bestowed with loads of that. At first, I was cursing my fate, my non-commitment to studies during the first and second years and what not. But then as time goes by, I realize I am not in a bad spot after all. I am beginning to like what I got -- not that I am forcing myself to. It's just that their field of work and their workplace excite me. So finally no qualms and it's a nice feeling!!! :)
And do check out their website. I started loving the company once I saw the website!!!

Another achievement I must rant about here is my getting insanely high marks in a mid-semester examination in KGP. This midsem I almost had a cent percent score in a subject in which I badly wanted to score. A FIRST for me in many respects (in KGP). A huge MORALE BOOSTER for my endsems, but I better hope the other subjects that I'd not performed satisfactorily won't turn out to ruin my party.

Project work is on in FULL SWING!!! Deadlines to match and Loads of stuff to read. Only the mind is not willing to co-operate. I was googling and downloading stuff for my project having bunked the InterHall Basketball practice, hoping to find something substantial for my project and lo, I am here blogging it out. Which reminds me of tomorrow's deadline. So let me bid goodbye and get back to doing something more purposeful.

Auf Widersehen.

And hope to blog more regularly (and hopefully not morose stuff like this!!!)

St.Valentine must probably be turning in his grave!!!

2007-02-14T19:25:00.001+05:30

St.Valentine was never a messiah for love..... There are numerous versions of how the day came into being. And there are an equal number of stories about the history of the day.

I was browsing for the actual history of the day when I found this link and many more such. The article on Wiki does not show a unique legend on whose name this day is celebrated. There seem to a fairly large number of St.Valentines or Mr.Valentines. Quite surprised infact, that such a widely celebrated day does not even have accurate history. All botched and made up for the convenience of a certain few commercial ventures/brands that make the most out of mislead people.

Of all the stories I came across, I'd prefer to believe the one about Valentine performing marriages when they were deemed illegal and hence being beheaded. He secretly married couples when marriage was forbidden by the Roman emperor and he was beheaded on this day.

It isn't a bad thing to celebrate LOVE. But these days, People use his name and create a lot of brouhaha and ruckus about being in love and use his name(and in particular this day) to do all sorts of rubbish. So, I guess, he must literally be at unrest in his grave as to how unimaginatively his name and intentions are being misused disguising lust and infatuation as love...................

P.S : Well, it isn't the frustration of not having a Valentine that I am showing off here. I am single and I am fine with it. All I am irked at is the non-sense I've seen people do on this day...... Literally!!!

LIFE

2007-01-30T16:01:00.000+05:30

Somewhere along the way, mediocrity creeps in. You become complacent. You take things too easily, take things for granted. All seems fine for a while. And, then suddenly, a loud THWACK on the face.

LIFE IS A BITCH!!! It slaps you hard and how.

Suddenly reality presents itself before you. The gravity of the situation knocks the wind out of your sails. Before you can realize that you are mired in a deep pit, it moves ahead, seemingly with a fierce fervour. Now you try to drag yourself out with whatever you can find hold of. It’s an epic struggle. Most give up while the prudent, stubborn few fight on to get back on track. The lucky few who resurface find that it’s too far ahead now. You have been thrown off track. So you now know all you can do is to play Catch Up. You keep sprinting desperately with determination and HOPE – an immortal soul. But then…………….

Note : Intern Blues

New Year. New Sem

2007-01-08T23:58:00.001+05:30

Wish you a HAPPY AND PROSPEROUS NEW YEAR

(I know its quite late in the day but then its the wishes that count I guess!!!)

Exit 2006. Enter 2007.

As if it makes much of a difference. Life still is the same I guess. The old problems stay. Newer ones await in the wings. So what significance does a New Year hold??? I might sound quite cold and preposterous when I divulge I do not attach much importance to a New Year's Day. It just is another day in this bland routine cycle called Life. Isn't it???

Four or Five years back, I would have been busy on New Year's eve preparing a list of resolutions for the New Year. I also had the habit of making this resolution thingy on my birthday as well. So twice a year, I usually made a list of resolutions and twice a year i wouldn't stick to what I ordered for myself. As the years flew by, I realised I was making a futile effort in trying to change my way of life. Every passing year has been a confirmation of my not sticking to atleast a single resolution I decided upon. So as I grew older and, rightly, wiser, I decided I wouldn't make myself look stupid anymore. So I bid goodbye to writing lists which also meant a lot of energy and time and paper and ink saved. So right now I am not forcing myself to act differently in any sense. Just nice being just ME.

As the importance of the day waned, so did the greetings I'd send. The only recipients this year were my aunt and my school teachers. I did not spend a buck on the phone wishing a friend or relative. It also had to do with the mind tuned to the fact that lines are always busy on New Year's day and it would be a gargantuan task to just get to someone on the phone. A calm day infact.

And oh, Thanks to the Timetable that is adhered to in Kgp, I had to spend a sizeable chunk of New Year's day( 10 hrs to be exact) in the train, for the third year running. So few of us had a small cake cutting bash in the train itself. The cake cutting had more to do with the growling stomach(s) than being a celebration instead. And with Jan 1st almost always being the start of the spring semester every year, it is generally a semester of hope. Every semester at the start I hope to do well and this time it is no different. Sitting pretty on my good performance last semester, I wish to carry forward the momentum this semester. But then Spring Sem has always been my Achilles heel. So I need to carefully tread and see that history isn't repeated. I know I can mess up big time. Hence I need be careful.

Add to that the fact that CAT is just 10 months and a few days away, so I need to prepare a routine for my preparation. 6th semester also comes gift wrapped with a project. So its project time as well. And we need to get geared up for a 2 month internship after the semester and the hunt for an internship too intensifies this sem. Hence the semester finally equates out to CATting + Intern Hunt + Project Work + CG. Wow!!! All in all, a Gala time awaiting me I guess.

So, I sign off the first post this year with no resolutions -- Will just be Me -- and also with clear cut goals for the semester -- the measure of success meant for another post right at the end of the semester. Adios till the next one.

Photo Courtesy of Hallmark Greetings

Ordeal for a BROADBAND Connexion

2006-12-29T15:24:00.000+05:30

Homecoming is always sweet. You are home and so you are the KING. At least I am when I come home after a long gap. Mommy just dotes on you and Pops brings all those things YOU like. Mommy doles out the recipes from her Huge Arsenal that wouldn’t fit Pops diabetes routine but nevertheless fares I’d die to gorge on. A welcome change from the bland Mess khana and other kgp stuff. Lots more love fill the day.

Two or three days pass until normalcy is restored. After the initial euphoria settles down, comes the laziness. There is not much on earth you can do but idle away your time. Watching TV and reading the odd magazine consume most of the time and then it is time for you to miss, inarguably, the most important thing in your life for the past 3 years – Kgp’s LAN. It just is something whose absence, you feel, leaves a gaping whole in your daily itinerary. You have grown so used to it and made it such an essential part of your life that its absence really hits you hard.

You feel disconnected from the entire universe and you just can’t stay with that feeling. The closest you can reach is having an internet connection at home. Even though the internet connection might not promise all the benefits that our beloved LAN provides us, something’s better than nothing, you’d agree.

So you reach for the nearest and fastest ISP provider and he promises you the connection in a day when you pay the exorbitant amount. You might argue that any measly sum would seem exorbitant when you pay nothing for the 24 hour net supply in Kgp – in addition to DC++, the source of all movies, sitcoms, series, videos, music there is on the planet. But then that’s the way it is. Whichever way you look at it, TATA INDICOM Broadband is about at least 10 times costlier than BSNL’s Dataone connection. I still rue the fact that there is no BSNL landline at home or else I would have surely preferred the latter.

2 days pass and there is no sign of any personnel from the Tata Indicom. So you go and shout your dismay there and warn and threaten him (The frustration of not being connected is what is supposed to be blamed for all those actions, I suppose). A week passes by wherein each day you barge into the ISP office and threaten and plead him for the connection. Fed up with the daily nuisance he lands up one fine day in the house and the connection is done.

Now that the internet connection has arrived, you feel a bit ecstatic. You begin surfing and then the problems begin. Half the time the server is down (I had to ring up the call centre and register 5 complaints in the span of 6 days) and the other half isn’t much better either. Fluctuating speeds and intermittent delays dampen your enthusiasm to browse. What’s even more annoying is the blank messenger window. Normally it shows one full screen view of online contacts but now with most kgpians relaxing in the comforts of their homes, the empty window makes me feel much more cheesed off. It wasn’t all that worthwhile in the end.

P.S: Typed 2 weeks ago. Troubling Net connection and now the nuisance-making computer caused the delay. Still damn frustrated.

DOWN..... OUT..... 'N' MIGHTY TIRED......

2006-11-29T04:57:00.000+05:30

Exams can do a lot to one's psyche. They intimidate you. They terrorise you. They punch you in the face, kick you hard in the gut, effect a KO. The VOLUME of material/books you ought to study to maintain your not-so-great, yet respectable CG(Another 2 dreaded letters) and the TIME you've got on your hands are utterly dispropotionate. For once you are brought down to earth. You get to know ground realities.

Having bunked classes at a feverish pace, sitting right at the back and dreaming (in some cases, sleeping right under the professor's nose) in the very few classes you manage to drag yourself to, just for the sake of an attendance, hardly helps. It desperately feels like a Failed Journey, even before you take-off. Exams are still those dreaded few letters themselves...."EXAMS".

Exams make you sit down and study. For once you open your books. For once you feel you are in HERE with a purpose. You get reminded you are here to get moulded into a MANUFACTURING ENGINEER. And then you realise, you weren't meant to take this shit.

Huh!!! How one wished there weren't any exams. There are far better ways to grade a person, I believe. And I stubbornly believe that CG isn't a true reflection of either a person's technical skills, expertise, grip on the subject, his potential or ability. It might be an indicator of the hardwork he'd put in. Even that can't be said for sure. A Controversial Topic to deal with. I agree. But then I'd really like some other alternative for these exams. Being a Junior Student right now, I shouldn't be sulking and fretting over all these. 5th semester has come to a close and there are 3 more semesters to go. Entering the most crucial phase of my Course(Training and Placement right ahead), I just need to brace myself, command all energy and stamina, race the pack already a fair distance ahead of me and hopefully put up a good fight. By now, you must be saying, "Stop sulking and Put up a fight you @$$."

YEAH!!! I DID. I did it this time around. Relax. It was just a good fight though. I concentrated all my energies, studied hard, put the thoughts behind, worked my ass off on all courses -- only during the exam time though, I must remind. But then I am not sure if it was worth it. The distance will still remain. The gap just isn't looking like its going to diminish. I even didn't go for Ravi's Birthday treat. (Sorry DUDE!!! I wasn't bent on disrupting your party plans but then it just didn't fit into my scheme of things.) But then even though I sound like a soldier wounded or a defeated boxer I am really not worrying about the result. It just feels good having given your best. It was just for one week, I know. But it has been long since I’d done that and it’s quite satisfying. The "working off my ass" has also left me DOWN…. OUT…. And MIGHTY TIRED.

I'd be quite happy if I don't just slip up though...Well, even that isn't in my hands. To hell with the results.........Now for some rest!!!

P.S : The actual version I'd written was quite big and infact boring (Not that this isn't). Hence I edited an incident I'd written about out of this and reposted it below. If you aren't exhausted having read this crap, then test the limits of your patience. See if you can finish the crap below this too.....

THE EDITED PART FROM ABOVE

2006-11-29T04:40:00.000+05:30

Well, here is something I wrote along with the one above. But then I edited it out. I felt the post was getting too lengthy. So if you are still not fed up reading the one above… Just go ahead.

Exams make you sit down and study. For once you open your books. For once you feel you are in HERE with a purpose. You get reminded you are here to get moulded into a MANUFACTURING ENGINEER. And then you realise, you weren't meant to take this shit. You just weren't meant to be this. This wasn't meant to be your true calling.

Which transports me back to my school days.

I was in class IX when one of my teachers trivially joked in the class, about how we'd either wind up as engineers and doctors. "Children of this generation hardly have other choices", she declared. I was quite upset at this thought. I wanted to be DIFFERENT. I wanted to different from the rest. I wasn't going to be an engineer or a doc, I told myself. That evening I set out on an onerous task - I'd make a list of all professions other than the aforementioned. I sat down frisking my mind and listing all professions I knew and by the end of the 2 hour study hour, I had a list of 89 professions, to be exact. Quite an amateurish list I must accept. But then I was quite proud of my efforts. I was going to be one of these, or so I thought.

Cut to class X after my board exams, I was busy contemplating which course to join, which college to join, which part of the country. I wanted to pursue Economics or Humanities and was at wit's end as to which one to choose. I knew I had a multitude of career avenues had I chosen Economics -- become an economist or a CA or a wat-else-is-possible. (Oops, I don't have the list with me right now. It is safe along with my letter and greeting collection back home) But I wasn't sure what I'd become pursuing Humanities. It was just my love for the subject, I guess, or maybe it had more do with my History teacher. I just loved her classes and her knowledge base and the way she drilled those stories into our heads. It wasn't that I was weak in Math or in Science. I liked those subjects, found them quite a bit fascinating and thats about it. Maybe those teachers weren't as inspiring and caring as my History ma'am. I had nothing against Math and Science.

I must really consider myself lucky because my parents readily gave me the go-ahead and were really happy about my choice when I'd first informed. For a person who consistently topped the class with minimum effort, (with due respect to my competition, I must admit having considered myself head and shoulders above everyone in the class and percieved myself as being in an altogether different league… Now I ain’t thinking the same though) choosing Humanities over Maths was bound to meet with mixed reactions. I expected my parents would pitch for my pursuing Pure Sciences. But then my parents completely endorsed my view. Mom even went to the extent of wanting to see me do my Bachelors in London School of Economics (LSE) and she was willing to fund it as well if I could get myself a seat in there. So far, so good and the hunt for the school began.

Class Ten results were out. I topped in almost every subject, had the highest total with my nearest competitor almost a fair distance behind me. I'd be getting 4 gold medals (Real Gold worth about 5k each) and lots more cash and goodies that year for my wonderful performance. There was lot of frenzy in the house. People were ecstatic. My parents were very proud of me, though I was sulking at not having crossed the School's Highest Total that was achieved quite a few years back. The house always brimmed with conversations about MY PERFORMANCE and MY FUTURE. They'd discuss it for hours and hours and feel so proud. It was during one causerie when mom told me gently, "Kanna (Means sweet lil' child in Telugu), Doing Humanities or Economics would mean our relatives commenting about your lack of calibre, lack of talent. They might indulge in petty talk that these 4 metallic pieces are just a one-off thing and that you really have no guts or the gumption to face the tougher world -- the Sciences and Math. You must be ready to brave the odds." That's it and nothing more. Suddenly my thought process took over. I sat down thinking. Those few words hit me hard. REAL HARD. I jusn't couldn't imagine myself being labeled a DUMB INCAPABLE SLOUCH.

I wanted to be DIFFERENT. TRUE. But I also wanted to be THE BEST. I wanted to be THE BEST more than being DIFFERENT. And at that very instant, I decided I would pursue only SCIENCES, because the failure to do would be construed my LACK OF ABILITY.

INCESSANT PRIDE. PRESTIGE. TWO SECONDS OF IRRATIONAL THINKING. And I am here what I am. Totally lifeless. Totally Disillusioned. Irate with having not pursued what I truly wanted to.

But then again, Life ain't so bad after all. I am in IIT - the best engineering college in the country. Yet, all these thoughts just keep rushing back when I start studying for the exams. I recollect things, scold myself and then get back to studying. It happens always and exams make me completely frusssssssst.

HUH!!! DUH!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM

2006-11-13T22:31:00.000+05:30

Words can’t truly express what I want to blurt out right this instant.

MOM, You have been my biggest source of inspiration and you will remain the single most influential person in my life – and I mean it in every sense of the word. I truly cherish the camaraderie we share. Everything I am right now is all because of what you had done for me – the numerous sacrifices, the heart breaking distances, the setbacks you braved, the love and care you showed. As you step into one more glorious year of your life, Your Birthday gives me a platform to reminisce the very many things that shaped my life -- the advice, the letters, the silly fights, the love, the anger and countless others. Let me thank you for all that you have done. And I am proud of you. Have a wonderful Birthday. YOU ARE MY HERO.

P.S : The pic here is of the card I’d carefully handpicked for MOM the last time I was in Kolkata…. But then I decided against mailing her. I just thought it wasn’t the right time to send a card especially when the whole household is shrouded in grief. Maybe I will make use of it for her birthday next year.

Miss You Grandpa

2006-10-29T02:45:00.000+05:30

God's finger touched him, and he slept.
--Alfred Lord Tennyson

On the 28th of October 2006, God looked around Heavens and sensed something missing. His garden felt the need of a fragrant flower – a flower that would radiate out sufficient warmth, love and compassion.

He looked upon Mother Earth and found your loving face.

God was Jealous; He wanted you to grace the heavens.
God wanted you in His Kingdom; He wanted you to share your love up there.

Henceforth his angel rode to earth: to pick you and place you in your rightful place – God’s heavenly abode.

You might physically be no more with us, but then you will remain in our memories forever and ever.

I will Miss you Grandpa.

The Void created by your absence will be hard to fill. But your teachings and love will carry me throughout. I just want to let it be known what a fabulous Grandpa you had been!!! Thank you Grandpa for the many things you taught me in life, for caring for me, for listening to me.

P.S : I do not know if it is right or wrong to express my sincere sentiments – esp. during my grief – in a forum as open and public as this. But since I couldn’t be beside the person I so very loved during his last moments has gotten me so forlorn. I do not even know how he would feel reading this from the heavens up above. I desperately feel like talking to him – The fact that he is no more only is intensifying the feeling. Such an irony.

Am getting so damn nostalgic as well. Thoughts don’t cease. Time seems like it has come to a standstill. Just can’t wait till I get home.

KFC, DON 'n' BAD LUCK

2006-10-25T00:39:00.000+05:30

These 3 words aptly sum up our Friday’s Kolkata trip. What happened the last time ten of us embarked on a Kolkata journey – presumably for some shopping and watching RDB – ended up as a total disaster. An Understatement, I know. So with a lot of apprehension and doubt as to how the trip would turn out, we started off -- Sivakin, Rampage n ME. Even Mom kept cautioning me the whole time I was with her on the phone, the day before we set out, and that only added to the perplexity of my psyche.

After a night out and catching the Howrah Mail at 3’O clock in the morning, we reached Kolkata in the wee hours early on Friday. After a brief snack at the station, we rushed off to the passport office to find ourselves right at the head of a queue that gradually grew till 10, which was when the office opened itself.
Four hours of standing in the queue wasn’t actually as agonizing as I had expected it to be. Gossip and petty talk carried us through the 4 hours and it was quick work at the office.

Next stop : City Center, Kolkata – The most happening place in the city. First thing we did on reaching the City Centre was book tickets for DON. I was actually astounded that we could manage tickets for an SRK movie – that too first day and that too the last rows.

KFC
With growling stomachs (the effect of spending almost 6 hours in a queue), the next thing on our minds was to fill our stomachs and there was always just one hang out on my mind – KFC. Having heard so much about KFC and its’ lovely burgers, I just couldn’t resist not being there. One KFC coupled with a Zinger Burger washed down with a Pepsi was all it took to fill my stomach. It was absolutely delicious – heavenly and appetizing. The Zinger Burger was a feast to the gastronomic senses as was the chicken. I can just go on yapping and raving about the burger. But I prefer to keep it short. If you are a non veggie and you do love chicken, do try out the combo I mentioned in KFC. Just recalling the experience is enough to cause salivation and wanting to have that heavenly bite once again. KFC – I will be coming back soon.

Later some heavy duty shopping for Formals, Tees and Greetings and it was time to face the DON.

DON
Less said about the movie, the better.
Dubious Screenplay. Unnecessary Twists and that too a plethora of unwarranted such, the last of which truly stretches the limits and tests your nerves. SRK’s hamming. Half Baked Characters. Illogical Plot. One can just go on……….
Result : I dozed off in the theatre. Sounds weird but True. I felt so sick and miserable for having spent 200 big bucks on such a SISSY of a movie trying to pass off as a STUD. A complete DUD.
The only reprise was the cinematography. Take a peek at DON if you are planning a trip to Malaysia in the future. You will surely get a wonderful preview of the fabulous locales there. Otherwise stay home and enjoy. Just don’t kill your senses for some non-sense.

Rampage and Siva at City Center

BAD LUCK
So when we purchased a passenger ticket only to find the last passenger leave (We were stuck in a traffic jam), we had to board the Howrah-Chennai Mail. With not enough money to pay for the Sleeper Class, we adjusted ourselves and boarded the General Compartment. It was almost 12 in the night when we alighted at Kharagpur. We were very happy as the whole trip went off without any glitches. But then Kolkata, Bad Luck and Myself seem synonymous… Here’s what happened the last time we went to Kolkata. I lost my mobile and Siva fell off a running a train and it was raining disasters that day.
Generally something untoward had to happen and it did. The Ticket Inspector at the station was quick enough to pounce on us and caught us for boarding the wrong train. He threatened us with words like charge sheet, magistrate, police and stuff – stuff that could send jitters through any civilized civilian aware of the weight of the words. Send Shivers through the spine… It did. After a lot of pleading and coaxing and apologizing, we were let off with a fine of Rs.200 per person (We had to use the ATM). How nice would it have been had we shelled out the Rs.80 per person for a sleeper class seat which the TTE politely told us was the actual fare. We were running short on cash and had to ditch that for a General Class Travel and found our way to a fine. But then Ifs and Buts don’t accomplish much other than compound the misery and instigate the pain.
Though we had a satisfying trip all along, the BAD LUCK in the end made us trudge back with a lump in the throat – a sense of déjà vu.

Which reminds me, the day Putta’s cycle went missing my status message in Gtalk read “I seem to be a BAD LUCK mascot” and I was only prophesizing the future.

An Eventful Week

2006-10-18T19:52:00.000+05:30

Thursday Night
Ready to leave for Kolkata early in the morning to get my passport done. An obstacle crops up – Rampage has no warden seal on his residence certificate. So forced to stay back.

Friday
Get to know that Inter Hall Technology Quiz is to be held the next day. And then that I have to appear for the selections. Luckily am selected.

Saturday
Inter Hall Tech Quiz.
GOLD
Kiran was on fire. Katoch and Bharat were their usual self. Me as usual was the sober, efficient supporting cast.

Sunday
Started searching for AUTOCAD 3D models on the net in a sincere effort to submit my ITPR assignment. Quite Successful infact. Managed to Google some decent stuff.

Monday
Open IIT Basketball Tournament – Semi Finals
MMM, the first year hall gives RK a run for its money. We sweat and fret to reach the finals. Luck seems to be smiling so far.

Tuesday
Open IIT Basketball Tournament – Finals
RK run KGP Kings quite close in the finals. Final Score: 65-64 in favour of Kgp Kings.
It’s awesome just having given the veterans such a tough fight and it would have been even better had we won, instead of just losing by a whisker.

Tuesday Night
It’s Raghu’s Birthday. After having a sumptuous treat in LS, we head back to find the cycle I’d borrowed from PUTTA stolen!!! Was a rude shock and even right now as I type this stuff out, it looks ridiculous as well as hard to digest.

I’m sorry dude. But not much was in my hands. I’d locked the bicycle properly if I am not mistaken. Hopefully we can trace it back.

I know this ain’t a diary but then I just wanted to make a record of this weird week.

Eventful with a mix of different emotions!!!

Ups….. Downs…. Successes….Disasters…. Who knows what lies in store for us ahead??? Was quite an ODD and DIVERSE week. So I just wanted to make a note of it.

That too with the sentimental stuff I have been upto lately, this would be quite a deviation from the morose stuff.

Happy Birthday, My Friend.

2006-10-05T01:48:00.000+05:30

Dear Friend,

It’s been ages since we met…. but you as a person have always remained close to my heart.
It seems like an eternity since we spoke…. but you remain my constant source of encouragement and inspiration.

I never knew what hit me. But I rendered it was the right thing to do. Maybe I was being harebrained. Maybe I was acting sensibly. But at that time I felt it was the right thing to do -- FOR US TO GROW APART.

The distance between us might never melt. I know I hurt your emotions a lot. But then I am not here to give any excuses. The moments we shared haunt me time and again. I can still feel the impact you had on me and you still have on me. Nobody has gotten close to knowing and understanding me as you did. I thank you with all my heart for the lovely moments we shared. Just wanted to say, “It would be nice to have you back as my friend”.

Haan, before I forget to wish you, Happy Birthday. So on the day that trumpets and echoes and celebrates the moment of your arrival into this world, I thank the heavens for your lovely presence and guidance in my life. Miss you in many ways, in ways words can never express.

Yours truly.

P.S : This was something I wrote yesterday, but was largely skeptical about posting. But then certain things are better not hidden. So I am posting this, a day later, after a lot of deliberation and thought.
Skepticism – for I believe my friend is never going to see this.
Deliberation and Thought lead me to summoning all courage and doing the right thing.

Photos Courtesy of Yahoo! Greetings and a little messy work in MS Paint.

Dunno Why???

2006-09-17T22:55:00.000+05:30

Why???

Why do I feel like blogging right now, when I have loads of stuff to learn for tomorrow’s exam and when I absolutely have no idea as to what fate awaits me during tomorrow’s exam?

Why does it feel like browsing the net when I know that I stand to gain much more if I studied for the ongoing exams?

Why does it feel like listening to James Blunt’s -- “You’re beautiful” again and again, when I have absolutely no suicidal tendencies or even a ‘girlfriend’ – forget her deserting me for someone else?

Why do I find it so burdensome to hold my attention and not let my thoughts wander during any course lecture – be it engrossing or boring?

Why do I fear failure so much when actually the desire to succeed burns so bright deep down inside of me?

Why do I feel so utterly claustrophobic—lonely and tied up—, when, ironically, I am in fact in the company of spirited, animated, bubbly and vivacious friends?

Why do I end up plastering a plastic smile across my sullen face when in others’ company?

Why does it feel so difficult to trust anybody when all I desire is someone to share my feelings and lighten up my heart?

Why does it feel so onerous to forget things that I ought to have forgotten a long time ago?

Why is it so difficult to break out of that pessimistic outlook I get into occasionally—for short time spans— when I know that it ain’t right and that too when I am completely aware of my malfeasance?

Why does it feel like dialing that number when I know the repercussions that will arise out of my actions will be quite severe?

Why does she feel so close to me and yet so isolated from me?

Why does the heart yearn to go home when I know that it isn’t possible until certain things fall in place?

Why do tears trickle out of my eyes and damp my pillow when I am on my cot and get lost in thoughts, when I know the majority residing in the time-zone I do are in a deep slumber?

Why???

Why then does it feel so???

A Stupid small story

2006-09-06T03:15:00.000+05:30

Once upon a time, there was a huge banyan tree that was scattered somewhere in a dense jungle(yeah, a chotu story….. mushy mushy story. Just read on). And so it happened that a young canary that just learnt the art of flying zoomed in onto a huge branch of that particular tree. As that cute lil’ canary (a male one at that) was gasping for breath (Yeah, it was tired, after all it had just learnt to fly), it saw a sweet looking puerile girlish dove staring at him with all the innocence in the world. The canary too looked on. Time passed by (No, not days, but just a few minutes) with blank stares. Summoning some courage the dove moved a bit closer to the canary. The canary now felt warmer. Taking the cue, the canary asked the dove as to what it was doing on that branch of the tree. The dove had no answer. It was just idling itself there and it was destined that she meet the delightful canary. Who could help that? The cold frigidity between them just melted as time flew and before they knew they had shared so much and could feel the distance lessening. (And please stop your thoughts there… These birds were still kids man!!! Dude Grow Up). And before they knew it, it was dusk, the sun had set and a sense of grey had enveloped the sky. So they bade each other goodbye – they had to move back to their own nests – each wishing to come back the next day and hopefully find the other waiting for them.

The next day the canary returned early only to find the dove waiting for him eagerly. All they did was talk – delicate gibberish routine daily stuff – and talk and talk. They loved talking to each other. They neglected the entire world and kept on chattering to no end. They loved each others company. As they noticed later, time sped on at alarming velocities.

This dainty charming friendship assumed huge proportions and developed into a very strong bond.

When the canary was down, the dove would be there to lift his spirits and conversely.

Whenever something irked the dove, the canary made sure the dove felt comfortable and mutatis mutandis.

When some trouble lurked, both made a collective effort to steer clear from the harm.

And just as everyone around thought that nothing could separate them, the canary had to depart to another place. (Maybe his parents wanted a cooler location to live) He could no longer meet the dove. Both were heart broken. Each wondered how they would live without the company of their dear friend and how that gaping void left by the loss of their dear companion would be filled.

But then life moves on. They bid goodbye, this time forever (they thought), and got on with life. The juvenile beings they were took the schism with a wounded heart but then the hurt healed in due course of time. Life moved on and on and on.

The canary matured with the years and grew into a fine adolescent bird. Years had passed on since that separation. He didn’t remind himself much about the dove.

Then suddenly one day as he was flying in the vast sky, he sensed a familiar face in the neighbouring flock of birds. It was a face he had known well – No points for guessing it right – well, yes that good old friend of his, the dove. The canary was ecstatic – it had found its childhood friend. This time it was the canary’s turn to take the lead. He found out the whereabouts of the dove – let me not concentrate on how and why the dove’s family migrated to the same place. He got back in touch with her.

Well let me cut the story short here…... It wouldn’t need a sage to declare this small story has a huge parallel with our lives. As kids we are good friends with the opposite sex and just as time passes and we grow older, we become rigid, we become stiff, we don’t know what hits us and we never see much of each other in our mid teens. Just as we hit adolescence we chance upon such friends and then all of a sudden we are at our wit’s end. Why wit’s end?? Yes, I will be coming to that a little bit later.

We start the correspondence again. We get back in touch and we begin knowing each other again from the start. Then on, it again takes the oft repeated, very strikingly familiar paths – yes, paths – in most of the relations. So let me get on with the paths, so we get on back to the story.

Path A

The canary gets in touch, gets coochie again. The canary (the dove in a few cases) decides that he while as a kid loved the dove and still does. Hence he proposes love to the dove.

This happens in most of the cases and I dunno why. Did the dove ever experience that ‘love’ when they were still juvenile???

Path B

The canary and the dove are at loggerheads. They do not know if they can be just friends. They are also not able to decide whether they had been in love, whether they are in love. Nothing much happens here. They are very hesitant in the relation. The conversations are dry. That amazing chemistry they shared is completely missing. They never can comprehend what hit them. They had shared wondrous moments when they were young but then the magic can just not be recreated. Nothing works out here. It’s relegated to a so-so situation.

And this happens in quite a few situations. Confusion Confusion and more confusion.

Path C

The canary and dove recollect those lovely days, discuss how they coped up with the separation, open up again, be frank to one another and become the good friends they once were.

And yes, this almost never happens. Though this would be my preferred way of rebuilding the relation. Guess ‘love’ can never cease entering the minds of the two people. Can’t pure friendship ever prevail???

P.S This piece of shit, I happened to write when I became completely frussssst after almost 3 hours of studying machine tools – something I am not really sure as to how useful that study is to my future!!!! This doesn’t intend to hurt anybody’s feelings and do read this at your own risk. Can make you frustrated as well.

P.P.S I cannot deny the existence of a similar story in my life and for the path.... well let it remain a secret for now. Also Don’t try asking me who the girl in question is.

4 months on a platter

2006-09-05T00:13:00.000+05:30

4 months in a few words… Wonder if that is possible!!! But then I will definitely try that with every ounce of effort while keeping myself fully aware that I need to be careful so as to not bore the world reading this “holy crap”. If you ask me why I’d decided to write all this, all you meet with is an ignorant and bewildered I-Just-Dunno why I’d done that expression. Cut the crap and let me start off.

May 8^th – 27^thWell that’s what my certificate says!!! I don’t exactly remember the dates though. Lovely vacation (read industrial training) in Vizag Steel Plant, Ukkunagaram…. Yeah the good ol’ Vizag….. Nag, Shankar and me…. Add Bunnu, Palli and Santhu for that extra dash of fun…Really fulfilling experience to say the least. Was our first window to the working of a large scale industry. The sheer magnitude of the steel plant can be quite intimidating. Really got to know quite a few things though I guess we should have braced ourselves a little more and showed sufficient enthusiasm to learn that wee bit more. Rue the fact that we have lost quite a bit of our inquisitiveness and the questioning aptitude since the JEE days. All in all an entertaining fun-filled knowledge-laced experience, something we will remember quite well for the rest of our lives. (The forthcoming interviews won’t let us erase this so easily from our memories). Now for a sneak peek into the days we spent there.

Lazy life – Uncles who are always eager to give us ‘lifts’/rides on their bikes till the factory and also further inside.(Love that lift culture – so helpful). -- Routine work shifts – literally had a ‘hot’ time in the furnaces and sooty bodies at the end of the day because of the coal dust that floats everywhere in the plant – Abysmally cheap and good quality food in the mess(Shankar’s eyes were always on that 10Rs chicken serving)—The customary afternoon session bunk and the quick naps— off to gajuwaka in the evening for some movie(Must confess here to watching about 12 movies during my stay)—the “chicken sp. Biryani” packets(Shankar, Do you remember???) to gorge on in the room at night—the innumerable mirchi bajjis we relished—long strolls in the plant—late night discussions about topics ranging from CG to CV to Palli’s girlfriend to anything in relation to the world—the occasional beach trip—Yeah man, training was fun, much much more than I expected it to be.

Then came June and I’d gotten home. Was desperately trying to land myself another training and so finally dashed off to Chennai with the hope of making it to one TVS Motors. But then they said I was too late. And just when it seemed like I would have to return without having accomplished anything, an uncle from Hyundai invited me over there. Also caught up with a few ol’ friends and teachers…. Visited SBOA, my school in addition to the training .

So another training for about 15 days in Hyundai Motors, Chennai. Lovely Place, Lovely people. Great work ethic, Even greater approach to work, dedicated target oriented workers. All in all a great place to be. But I can’t stop complaining about the hectic schedule.

Early morning wake up at 4 30 – Bus at 5 30 – Reaching the factory at 6 30 – Lovely, Absolutely Lovely Breakfast – Shop Floor Visits – Process appreciation – Reveling seeing the absolutely awesome-fantastic-ginormous-sophisticated machinery –Brief Lunch (Again Awesome) –Further shop floor study – evening bus home at 4 00 -- Almost mandatory traffic jam – reaching uncles home by 7 30 in the night – a few minutes of soccer world cup and then this tired guy eats a lil’ and jumps off to bed.

Then to Vijaywada…. Off to Hyderabad….. Caught up with a lot of Johnians….

Back home…. And don’t ever ask me what happened next??? The most tumultuous phase of my life… Nerve-wracking 15 days. Absolutely no idea as to how I – and other family members – got through this!!! And then returned back to Kgp.

Integrated back with friends… lots of new stories to tell… lots of stories I’d heard as well… Two and a half months being apart and then getting back together… Lots of fun moments to share… And yes this span is sufficient to change a person. Lots of changes I observed in my dear friends…

Right now, Midsems round the corner and I feel like doing everything in the world other than open my books. Open. Close. Open the book… stare at a few pages…. Call yourself an ass for not studying regularly. Look at the same page again for 5 more minutes. Nothing gets into your head. Concentrate again. Have had enough. Throw the book on the cot. Get in front of the computer. Start searching DC++ or the net. Chat with a few friends. Feels great!!! Look at the book on the cot and say “Man, Academic Books are not my cup of tea”.

Well, that’s my state right now… Absolutely clueless!!! Really trying to figure out why I’ve written all this crap in the first place.

Time to Update!!!!

2006-09-04T23:26:00.000+05:30

Yeah!!! Damn right….. Definitely the time to update… its been ages. Haven’t opened my blogger account, for like, 4 months say…No posts, very less blog browsing too.

So what the hell on earth have I been up to the past few months??? Actually speaking, this self imposed exile (distance sounds better, I guess) from blogging has specific reasons(or doesn’t it???)….

Did someone ask me to shy myself away from blogging???

Was I frightened the world would find the real ‘me’???

Was I making a fool of myself ranting in the public domain???

Even I dunno for sure what hit me or kept me out of my blog’s way. Now that I am back (I’ve been able to iron out a few differences too by the way), hopefully the blog gets some regular visitors and also a few posts and a much wanted new lease of life. So dudes, lemme shake some rust off my back and get back to blogging.

2006-05-05T00:46:00.000+05:30

Hectic Exam Schedule Done with. The less I talk about my exams the better it would be.
Setting New standards with every pasing exams. Reached Lofty heights of Sluggishness and ended the exams with expectation of fewer marks/grades.
Reached home on the 1st of MAY. Fixed the computer.
Status Quo : Aimlessly wandering the house searching for "WHAT-NEXT-TO-DO-TO-STAY-AWAKE"
Meanwhile let me keep guessing (and getting frightened) as to what lies in store for me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Arbit Thoughts

2006-04-07T18:39:00.000+05:30

One more week has passed away. Though I wish I could post at the amazing frequency at which 'Who-am-I' does, but then I am self confessedly the laziest bug on earth. And that makes a post all the more difficult. And as the title suggests I have no clue as to what I would be yapping the next few lines. Just have that pinch of patience and Hope you will be through to the end.

Bad news on the homefront! Grandpa was supposed to be discharged today but the things didn't work out as planned. He's caught a fever last night and last time I called mom, she said that he is on 'Oxygen' right now. Sent shivers down my spine when I heard 'oxygen'. I have this peculiar habit of envisioning things that do not exist and things that might happen in future. Makes me go all the more weak on my limbs.

Well, I am starting back home tonight -- Not home exactly, But to Care Hospitals in Vizag, which means a slight change in plans. And then I will have to be back by Monday afternoon for the Mine Surveying lab. So all in all a tough weekend for me.

Inching closer to the dreaded "End-Sems" -- Yeah, The time most Kgpians would want to keep at a distance. Lots and lots to mug. 4 exams the first 2 days -- the 24th and 25th. Could it get any worse???

I came to know last week that additional 27% reservations was being mooted for OBC's in IIT's and IIM's. Can't the goverment leave the caste politics out of IIT's and IIM's??? As if the reservations already present aren't sufficient. Why is the goverment hell bent on breaking the IIT's and IIM's back? What's been absolutely pathetic is the Diro's take on this issue.......

The other eye-catching news was concerning the eye-popping Rs 1 crore salaries the ISB grads drew during their placements. Not one but four such "Crorepatis". Is the ISB well on it's way to overhaul IIM's in their stature??? The complete true Story lies here. A Grad with 10 years experience -- Certainly takes the sheen out of the "Crorepati" tag.

Almost Forgot. We won silver in the Inter hall basketball tournament. Get to know the story behind the silver here. We were outclassed by a top-class team in the final. Lots of lessons to be learnt after the sound thrashing that was meted out to us by our opponents. Yet the silver means a lot, though I would have preferred a different script before it came in hand.

Was subject to some Serious Breach of Privacy... that too coming from trust-worthy quarters. Was seething with fury and sulking for the major part of 2 days. Unexpected Rude Intrusion into personal space -- Nothing can be more irritating than that.

Been a week of a lot of Blog-Browsing.

KS is taking blogging to new heights. Found no words to describe his latest post. It tickled my funny bone, packed a few punches targeted at certain practices and made fun of a crazy development in the blogosphere -- tagging. Check out his satire on Tagging.

Also Found this damn interesting 2 line review about RDB.

REVIEW
Rang De Basanti = The Legend of Bhagat Singh + Yuva
"with much less impact"

FabVocab is shaping up quite nicely. One word per day and the sense of satisfaction I derive out of that -- Quite nice.

Post's got too long and boring I guess. Will be back Monday and hope everything is fine there with Grandpa. Just can't wait to get out of here.

Did I say I was Busy???

2006-04-01T02:16:00.000+05:30

Blogging after a fairly long hiatus. With a heavily loaded week just over, I can see a packed week staring ahead at me. Been quite busy over the last week. So let me recapitulate the hectic week spent.

Well, Dear Nag has started blogging -- Click here for his amateur blog. As I commented on your first post -- "Way to go dear!!! For someone who did his entire schooling in Telugu medium, you write quite well and the desire in you deserves Kudos and special mention."
Started a new blog -- FabVocab -- one word to learn each day in a sincere attempt to reach the upper echelons of you know what!!!
Almost Forgot! The Thermodynamics Mid-Sem marks were out during the week. Got exactly what I expected -- did not deserve even a wee bit more for the effort I put in. Not exactly satisfied though.
Rampage got a tad bit upset with the mockery 'we' -- Dave, Shaggy, Nag and others and me -- made out of his "uh!! Huh!! Hun!!" frequent mentions in his posts. Sorry if you were really hurt but then you must learn to take it with a pinch of salt. Secret : He even deleted a few Huh's from his earlier posts and reposted the edited ones, I believe, though he vehemently denies doing so. (Don't ever tell ramp. Or else He is gonna kick my ass)
The Thermodynamics Class Test was due this Thursday and I was game for it without even touching the books, without the slightest fear that 20 marks out of 100 hinged on the outcome of this test. Impudent, Impertinent, Shameless!!!!!! Call me whatever you like. Maybe I deserve much worse "gaalis". How the hell on earth did I become so negligent and nonchalant about marks? Don't need to mention how the test went. It's anybody's guess.
Yo RK!!! 2 Basketball League matches played. One with Patel. The Other with VGSoM. Won both comfortably even though the scoreline was in favour of our opponents by the end of the first quarter each time. Everytime the team was in a trench, a combination of Common Sense, Rathee and Chochu Prevailed and pulled us out of the rut. Me, as usual, was on the sidelines without being substituted -- No rude jolt this. I was mentally prepared for that. So all this prompted to me being tagged the "WaterBoy", "The CheerLeader" and my being the butt of ridicule of many a joke. Life's a great leveller and I will do get my chances. (Or did they get theirs???)
Thursday was Ugadi -- New Year on the Telugu Calendar(Gosh!! When will I understand this calendar???). The Telugu Association of IIT Kgp, organised a get together and a Supper -- So you now know what exactly was on my mind!!! Gorged on the lovely south Indian cuisine -- a rarity in this part of the country. Devoured up to my fill. Must mention the lovely Tomato curry and the sweet -- reminded me of Home in all respects.
Finally I managed to get the Consent Letter for pursuing Summer Training In Vishakapatnam Steel Plant. Now the remaining work is to fix up the dates -- Ideally I would like it to be a 3 week training. Only after the dates for this have been fixed, can I go about working on the training at Volvo, Bangalore.
Been quite long since my last Telugu movie on my comp. DVD Rip's of Athadu and Ghajini shared on the LAN this week. Saw Ghajini earlier. Hence watched Athadu. Was a Great Entertainer. Was a good movie inspite of the few flaws. Especially liked the character Trisha potrayed -- that ziddi, pompous village belle. Might watch it once again in the near future.
Today had SUPER SPECIAL DINNER. It was the Treat that the Final Years were giving us --Their Beloved Juniors -- for all their wonderful achievements. The Music playing in the background as well as The Music System were awful as was the selection of songs. Huge array of dishes to please the palate. But the cooking was awful. Mutton Tikka -- Yuck, Tasted like Saw Dust. Mutton Curry was not wholly cooked. You could get that odd raw smell. Rice and Veg curries were so-so. Desserts-- Rabdi, Gulab Jamun, Jalebi and ICE CREAMS -- were the best part though.
Waited impatiently for 'something', irritated someone a lot for that specific 'something' and it's yet to fall in my hands.
And something I got to know just a few hours back. Grandpa is admitted in the hospital in Vizag. Nothing Serious is what Mom had to say, Just old age and cardiac Problems. He's been put under Observation for a few days. Suddenly there is gloominess all around, The heart grows heavy, Miss you all a lot. Love you Grandpa, Do get well soon. Feels Bad that I can't be there with you atleast in such situations. Looking forward to coming home at the earliest and seeing you in full health. Awaiting that cherished sweet talk with you in the balcony.

Languishing here without knowing what to do during the weekend. Another Busy week ahead as I said. 2 Baski matches the next 2 days. Need to complete a C program -- Mechanisms n Machines Submission most probably next week. Mine Surveying Chart to be made. Probability Class Test on Friday. So what do I do next???
Time is the best healer, they say. So lemme watch a movie now. Time will take care of the rest.

Hurt........................

2006-03-20T03:22:00.000+05:30

Yeah..... Seriously Hurt!!!!!! Don't ever ask me why??? Many incidents to quote...!!!

Some Good words backfired.............

Someone I deeply respect made an unwanted, inexpedient statement..........

Some trust I placed in another was compeletly misplaced...........

Some really good, straight forward work went unnoticed and unappreciated........

Was Hurt as a result of Lack of Faith in me...........

Different Situations... Different Feelings.... The HURT stays.. rather hurts a lot.... Life's looking like its in the doldrums, full of disillusionment.......... Who is going to exonerate me??? When will life return back to normal???

Oh! Lord.... Please spare me this torture... get me out of this pain, this anguish, this wretchedness.....!!! All I can do is hope this is a Delusion. Or is it my fallacy???

Time I stop complaining and time to get back to some serious work!!! Maybe by the time I make my next post, I will be back to normal...............

The Jinxed post -- But a Gr8 Song neways

2006-03-16T16:31:00.000+05:30

One more great song, Just wanted to share these beautiful lyrics of Michael Jackson’s Heal The World. One of MJ’s lesser known songs. Actually MJ also setup the Heal the World Foundation for the aid of children all around the world, especially Africa. Dunno what has happened to the foundation. Even the website doesn’t exist anymore. Anyways, here are the lyrics.

HEAL THE WORLD
Written and composed by Michael Jackson

(Think about, um, the generations, and that we want to make it a better place for our children and our children's children so that they know it's a better world for them. I think they can make it a better place.)

There's a place in your heart
And I know that it is love
And this place could be much brighter than tomorrow
And if you really try
You'll find there's no need to cry
In this place
You'll feel there's no hurt or sorrow

There are ways to get there
If you care enough for the living
Make a little space
Make a better place

Heal the world
Make it a better place
For you and for me and the entire human race
There are people dying
If you care enough for the living
Make a better place for you and for me

If you want to know why
There's a love that cannot lie
Love is strong
It only cares for joyful giving
If we try
We shall see
In this bliss we cannot feel
Fear or dread
We stop existing and start living

Then it feels that always
Love's enough for us growing
Make a better world
Make a better world...

Heal the world
Make it a better place
For you and for me and the entire human race
There are people dying
If you care enough for the living
Make a better place for you and for me

And the dream we were conceived in will reveal a joyful face
And the world we once believed in will shine again in grace
Then why do we keep strangling life
Would this earth crucify its soul?
Though it's plain to see
This world is heavenly
Be God's glow

We could fly so high
Let our spirits never die
In my heart
I feel you are all my brothers
Create a world
With no fear
Together we'll cry happy tears
See the nations turn their swords into plowshares

We could
Really get there
If you cared enough for the living
Make a little space
To make a better place

Heal the world
Make it a better place
For you and for me and the entire human race
There are people dying
If you care enough for the living
Make a better place for you and for me

Heal the world
Make it a better place
For you and for me and the entire human race
There are people dying
If you care enough for the living
Make a better place for you and for me

Heal the world
Make it a better place
For you and for me and the entire human race
There are people dying
If you care enough for the living
Make a better place for you and for me

There are people dying
If you care enough for the living
Make a better place for you and for me

There are people dying
If you care enough for the living
Make a better place for you and for me

(You and for me)
Make a better place
(You and for me)
Make a better place
(You and for me)
Make a better place
(You and for me)
Heal the world we live in
(You and for me)
Save it for our children
(You and for me)
Heal the world we live in
(You and for me)
Save it for our children
(You and for me)
Heal the world we live in
(You and for me)
Save it for our children
(You and for me)
Heal the world we live in
(You and for me)
Save it for our children

This one’s got a great video too… Quite a thoughtful song. Especially love the words that the lil’ kid says at the start of the song – something for each one of us to ponder about and for each one of us to try follow. Soothing music, lilting voice with MJ at his best, absolutely marvellous and thought provoking lyrics – subtly embedded with a message, great choreography with its own fair share of disturbing yet inspiring scenes – All in all, one Classic Song!!!

Lots of Trouble Blogging

2006-03-16T02:59:00.001+05:30

Changed my template yesterday... created a few links.... And all the time i get to see that 403-Forbidden Error page. Lots of encounters with that dreaded page the past 2 days. For the past half an hour, I've made 3 valiant attempts to post the lyrics of MJ's Heal the world -- once it showed a double entry in the blog -- erased those 2 without saving, once the 403 error and the other time I switched to explorer from my trusted Firefox and it ended prematurely quoting some runtime error. Where does the fault lie??? Is it the proxy creating problems or is it the bad server at blogger.com??? Or could the problem be with Internet Explorer or with the blogger himself??? Whatever be it, the post is jinxed. But I will make one more attempt tomorrow -- to post the jinxed article. It's too late(uh huh!!! 4 in the morning is to be called early or late???) to give myself another go at it.

Lots of eventful happenings the past few days. Holi today-- The festival brings with it all those colours -- quite some fun spraying colours on one another. My vest was torn to tatters... Thank God, My short was spared. Had a photo session with those colourful bodies and faces. Well, Slept all day after the Holi bash. Woke up to write the short story for the MOTOFWRD competition - I didn't want to give myself a chance to feel bad for not taking a shot at a competition where the first prize is worth 4 lakhs and also 2 months internship at MOTOROLA. All we needed to do was write a short story or an essay envisioning the future of Seamless Mobility - Don't ask me what that means. Came up with a sick story. Will post it here soon. First let me get a few reviews on that. I had to make myself creative for 30 mins -- How sick can that be??? And after sweating out my grey caps for half an hour, I framed the story in words in about 1 hour -- Man, Things like these can get really tiresome. Just as I submit and begin to relax I get this call for BASKI Practice. Whacko Guys we are... Practice at 11 in the night till 2... And at 4 on the comp blogging it out. Wacky.... Not quite!!!

Now for some serious campus news . Heard that our SSM - the Hall's Second senate member after the Happa or the Hall Prez -- is going to MIT. 3 cheers to Reddy!!! Well even RP's SSM is going to MIT for further studies. Well, What's with these SSM's??? Feels great to know people around you are scaling new peaks. But at the same time there's that insecurity... You begin to think of your future.... Where will I be??? Am I good enough??? Whatever be God's will, Just moving forward with time, hoping for the best. Once again, 3 cheers to Reddy... even tho' he might never ever have a look at my blog.

It's been a Pleasure Writing this out!!!!!

2006-03-12T23:27:00.000+05:30

Some great feelings that make my life worthwhile…………..

When I return home from hostel, say after 4 months or so, and I find mom, dad, grandma and grandpa waiting eagerly at home – keeping on hold their busy work schedule. When mom hugs me hard and says, “Feels like ages ra, kanna. Feels great to have you back.” When grandma invariably has to say “You’ve grown weak and thin” irrespective of whether I have gained weight or lost it.

Late night dinner on the couch -- The 5 of us together -- discussing various topics ranging from human psychology to academics to politics to sports to even my girlfriends and sometimes when dad shifts off to the prospective daughter-in-law in waiting!!! That’s sheer fun.

When I sit on grandpa’s lap (and he is on his special stool in the balcony) and we explore the world looking at the same old neighbourhood that has been the same for ages, yet find something new to rant about.

Watering plants on the 2^nd floor roof top along with mom in the evening. Fighting it out for the television remote with papa. That’s fun. …. Haan almost forgot….. Inviting grandpa to watch WWE (wrestling) along with me…. He loves that and so do I.

When I can see mom hurriedly trying to make something in the kitchen, even when she has got to go on her work – the sense of satisfaction fills you up, the love on her face shows. When my cell rings at home and mom is like “Is that your girlfriend??? Won’t you introduce me to her??”….. When I can smell the aroma of “Keema Fried Rice” – This onez my mom’s speciality – that wafts through the air to my room early morning (I mean 10 or so)…. And then the heavenly taste of that in my watering mouth…. When mom advises me about life, about the world and the many ways of the world…….. Seeing Mom and Dad playing pranks on each other… quite kiddo at times they are and it’s always fun seeing them like that. When we, as a family, go out to a movie….. When I see my mom exploding in tears for the silliest of emotional scenes and when I hand out the hand kerchief and she smiles…. Later when we have a great dinner somewhere outside.

Speaking to mom over the phone when away from home (I’ve been in hostel almost all my life and this is the 15^th year). When mom scolds me for taking too long a break before calling her (a gap of 2 days is enough for her to term it long)......When I hear dad proudly tell people around him “my son is in IIT.”…..

When we sit in the room and gossip about irrelevant stuff in the hostel…. When someone says “Let’s go Billoo’s/Sup Dup/ wherever. Today’s mess khana sucks”…… When does it taste good in the first place? Late night walk down to Chhedis. Chatting over a Tinku about what not….
On the Vidhan Chowk Lawns with “Da Gang” having nothing else to do on earth…. Just for some casual bhaat….. When I bunk a class for some extra sleep…. When I submit some assignment I just copied from some maggu, alongside him……

When I complete some long pending work… When I lie on the bed after a tiring day….. When I sleep…sleep and sleep …. I love my deep slumbers…. Those 10 -12 hrs continuously in my dreams…. Love the smell of the earth before it rains… the fragrance rocks…… When I put my nose on the fuel lid of bikes to smell some petrol…. The weirdo that I am….

When I find someone waiting online anxiously for me….. When someone wishes me on my minute accomplishments…. When my phone keeps ringing for about an hour on the zeroth hour of my birthday, courtesy the amazing friends I have….When I am on my way to Vijayawada during the holidays to meet my aunt, uncle, akka and also Surya and Khan, when I reminisce of our school days…. When I remember how Miss Brijit and Bro Jaico would try instilling some good qualities in us….. When I am out for a cinema with my friends in Vijayawada….. When we roam the streets on the bikes doing nothing…. The sweet times at Baker’s Inn…. The times I again think of those lovely school days…….

Having fun with akka(my cousin, though I consider her my own)… playing pranks on her, running off after smacking her, calling her names, pulling her knee length braided hair and at the end of it all when I sleep in her lap after all the mischief…… seeing the smile on her face….. Nothing more heartening than that smile…. Well I cannot put all those feelings in the words… I’d be surely making an understatement.

Time I spend with sweet kiddo cousins….. listening to their gibberish talk…. Nothing sweeter than that… The sight of a nice comment to my post… any word of encouragement when I am down and out….When someone asks me “Post soon and do tell me what it is all about before hand!!!”……

I can go on filling pages and pages… Maybe I will add some more later….So lemme stop here… By the way, What are yours???

Confused!!!!!!!

2006-03-11T23:22:00.000+05:30

Confused!!! Now what do I write...... Saw Crash yesterday in the afternoon after a "We've got nothing to do here" Forming Lab and then later Saw RDB early morning today(or late night yesterday) for the first time (The DVDrip was made available on our beloved DC++ only yesterday and I had to see it the day it was there... No excuses)-- Yeah that sick RANG DE BASANTI.... maybe that is why I am confused.

How could people lap up a movie with such a blatantly false message??? What the director was trying to put across got me really mad. Watching Aamir Khan as a college going punk(Where's the college shown in the first place???), lovey-dovey Siddarth with that "I-dunno-what-to-do-n-I-dontcare" looks got me very nauseant. And people are calling it the best thing ever coming out of Bollywood. Not a patch on some of my most loved Hindi movies (DCH, HumTum, Swades, Bluffmaster.... in no specific order). Was a bad choice I felt. (Saw this one from 12 to 3 in the night.... was yawning all through and was scratching my head at the intermission point as to what the story was that far!!!). Could have utilised the time a little bit better -- obviously by watching some better movie. I know I need to be ready for some brickbats for saying so much.... But I think there are enough people of my tribe -- those who hate RDB fiercely.

I am not done with this. Will come out with an extensive review of RDB, Crash and Brokeback Mountain -- the most talked about movies in the recent past -- RDB
for its message to the youth, Crash for winning the best movie Oscar and Brokeback for losing to Crash even after being a firm favourite. I have seen Crash and RDB. So Brokeback soon -- Promise you will not need to wait much before that is out!!!

And, meanwhile Capote and Walk The Line can wait for sometime.

Still Confused!!!! What do I further write about..........

Aravind says, "Babu, Inkosari aa social service messageslu rasi blog lo mammalni champaku ra" (Please dont kill us with your social messages one more time.)

As a result of my previous post on the BLANK NOISE PROJECT, I have been getting diverse reactions. People are like "When have you become a saint???". "Hey these don't suit you at all." For the people mocking me for being a saint... I am no saint but I am doing whatever little I can. And there are people who genuinely seem to appreciate the effort. Thanks a lot. I can also find many like me opening their eyes as to whats happening around.

I am also getting to know new things. A few friends, ofcourse females, have either mailed or called up, laughed at my ignorance, and told me things they have never ever told -- about the experiences they have had. Well, that wasn't so unexpected I guess. "How could you have not bothered about this so long???", asked one friend. Well, guess I opened my eyes right now.

Ok Ok enough of moral lessons. Otherwise Aravind is gonna smack me on my head I guess. He'd already be fuming over my rubbishing RDB and then for also for writing this crap here.

Been following news on IIM-A's Day Zero -- The first day of placement on the elite campus. I'd love to be there someday as a proud student of the ginormous institute(Have a lot of time before I can fulfil that dream and meanwhile, am ardently following my seniors going through the GD and interview phase). There has been a new recruitment complex constructed for the process, keeping the mediapersons away. Yet there is enough news on the net speaking about the salaries offered. Just have a look at the companies on Day Zero -- Lehman Brothers, McKinsey and Co, Barclays, Credit Suisse Boston, Deutsche Bank, Merrill Lynch, USB Warburg Pincus, Bain & Co, ABN Amro Singapore, Barings Bank, Boston Consulting Group, Booz Allen Hamilton, BP Singapore, Citigroup,AT Kearney and we dunno who else.

Whopping pay packets and Glittering Career prospects. Highest of $1,85,000 prospective offer from Barings Bank and a highest domestic pay of Rs 20 lakh... That's big bucks for sure. 100 offers from around 20 companies and thats the status after Day Zero. Who wouldn't want to be there -- I would give my everything to be there. Though ethically speaking you ought to be there for the love of doing an MBA and not the money!!! I agree, but the pay packets play a lot on your mind I guess. Anyways I always thought of doing my MBA. Sometimes I regret having taken to the sciences after class 10. Family pride and prestige drove me away from my love -- humanities and economics. Otherwise I would have given CAT last november. Though I sometimes regret not having done humanities, I am happy with myself. You don't need to complain being an IITian. Maybe the charisma of this great institute attracted me enough to let leave my true love.

Was also looking at the India England Scorecard at cricinfo. Sachin Tendulkar fails once again in the first innings in the second test vs England at Mohali.... I Don't follow cricket upclose. But then I love the way this man carries himself on and off the field. 2 of my most loved sportsmen -- Sachin and Pete Sampras -- have one thing in common. They speak less and do all their talking on the field, with the bat and the racquet, respectively. And I love them for that. Well, Sachin!!! It happens always I guess. 2 hundreds in 2 years is too little for this champion batsman. Hit back fast at the earliest, Sachin. Just can't see you struggling out there.

Well, That brings me to the other legend -- Michael Schumacher. Another F1 season got underway yesterday with the Bahrain Grand Prix. And Yippeee!!! Schumacher grabs pole and teammate Felipe Massa sharing the front row with him. Way to go Ferrari. The staunch Schumi n Ferrari fan that I am, couldn't have asked for a better start for the season. Schumi, Just go on firing all cylinders and hopefully the Driver's and Constructor's Championship will be back at the Scuderia soon.

I never miss out on a F1 race when I am home and Dad never goes without taking a dig at me, perplexed by my love for the sport. "How come do you feel like watching the same car whizz past over and over on a clean road with almost no traffic repeatedly???", he asks. I got no answers but then I love the sport and thats the bottomline.

Still Confused!!! Why do I need to put up such a confused skewed concoction of likes, hates, life, moral values, sports, sportsmen and what not!!! Hopelessly confused.. Confused with life. Maybe I have nothing to do and thats why I am confused!!! So am I jobless???

Haan, exactly...... exactly that word sums it all up -- Jobless. Think I do know that I have a Mine Surveying Lab test Monday and an extract to write for the MOTOFWRD competition. Still...... I can call myself Jobless I guess. In IIT everyone's jobless all the time I guess -- Nothing seems to bother us -- Anyways.... A movie would be fine now to satiate my joblessness right now.

BLANK NOISE PROJECT -- TIME TO THINK

2006-03-10T00:36:00.000+05:30

This one's got me thinking all over again. Well, In which direction is "MAN"kind moving??? Just have a peep into the "BLANK NOISE PROJECT" -- a sincere attempt to fight vocally against "Street Sexual Harassment". I was startled reading first hand accounts of women sexually harassed and assaulted on the streets. Never before have I come across or heard about such ghastly incidents, things looked highly difficult to digest. I even ended up commenting Deepthi's post -- that was the first post I read on the Project -- as being highly exaggerated. I never knew the intensity of the situation. I am sorry for that, sorry for my ignorance. But then I have been browsing through various other bloggers' personal experiences and man, they scare the shit out of me. I am slowly beginning to realize the truth. Sexual harassment exists almost everywhere -- at the workplace, at the bus-stop, at the canteen, at the college, at home too in certain cases......................... I was just ignorant all the time. Every woman has her own story -- stories (Go through Mang's Post) suits better. No woman is spared. It becomes quite obvious once you go through the comments on various blogs that almost all women have faced such situations -- guys poking fun at their private parts, calling them names, groping and snatching at the breasts and what not!!! It gives me jitters just having to type this stuff out.

"Is being born a woman a CURSE???"

"What is it you guys have with breasts and butts???"

"What would be your reaction if someone fondled your SISTER'S BREASTS???"

" Just put yourself in my place and you will understand that speaking a word during such time is almost impossible!!!"

"Is having a body endowed with breasts something to be ashamed of???"

"Can't you understand you are making life miserable for WOMEN with your dastardly deeds???"

"Why cant we as women be respected? Are men really so deprived?......"

Well, the emotional distress people have been under shows. Such hard hitting questions just keep on knocking the wind out of my sails. Once you browse through the various posts in the blog-a-thon of the PROJECT..... There are currently around 70 contributors to the cause -- you can find a varied range of emotions and lurking questions hitting you hardly across the face. What answers have you got for each one of the questions posed??? Well,it's time to think for yourself!!! Going through Mumbaigirl's post got me wondering as to what kind of incidents my family members and friends of the opposite sex had to go through. They have never told me about any such incidents. Maybe, They never will. Now, I am worried about their security, their privacy..... Where have the ethics and the moral etiquette gone??? It' s high time insinuated men leave their wicked ways and let women lead a secure life without these road blocks. One needs to understand there is lot more to life than breasts and buttocks.

One may ask -- What's the use having this Blog-a-thon session???
An excerpt from KnownTurf's Post gives you the perfect answer. "How do you know? Some teenaged boy somewhere reads this and decides not to molest women... you never know." People ignorant of these facts get a real insight into life -- how difficult it is for a woman to be there out in the public, to board a passenger bus/ train, to go somewhere in an auto in the night...........
Deepti says, "I hope the girls who read this post of mine gain the courage to be brave themselves and know they are not alone. I hope the guys who read this know to not just never harass but also spread the message and get the same attitude grilled into their friends.And I hope that everyone who reads it understands that even young children are susceptible to being harassed and get easily traumatised by it.So keep an eye on them for such signs of withdrawal and educate them when they are still very young about what they need to watch out for."
Yes, this blog-a-thon is for the girls to voice out their trauma, share their feelings with others -- keeping things to oneself can prove so fatally depressing. Girls also do get to know that they are not alone in their sufferings. Gain Strength from the fact that you have seen lot of support from the male community as well. It's quite clear that you will have lots of support if you can report things happening to you. Just raise a hue and cry if someone makes a lewd pass or comment or something untoward happens and I am sure the people there will look into the rest. Do not control your emotions staying quiet... you will only be giving him the licence to grope you further by doing this.

Seems I am not good at this stuff and I have spoken enough. I have been trying for the past half an hour to voice my emotions and All I am trying to do out here is make my small little contribution to Blank Noise Project. Kudos to the brains behind the Blank Noise Project. There's a lot more work to be done though before this evil can be uprooted. Atleast, you have got quite a few heads speaking and thinking -- The number of comments on each post is proof enough that you have got many people expressing their anger and concern. And that's the best part.

What Kind of Shadow Are You?

2006-03-05T15:24:00.000+05:30

Well, Checked out this amazing blog and took this quiz. This is what it figured out me to be..... Wonder how true this analysis is!!!

You are a human shadow. If a loved one needs you, you are always right at his or her heels! Your deep social connection with human beings produces your qualities of genuine caring and charisma. However, at times you are naive to the true nature of your loved ones. Remember that humans' gift of free will does not always lead them in wise directions. But your essence of love and friendship represent the other precious gifts of humanity. Overall you are a strikingly valuable and innocent being who has a lot to give.

1883 other people got this result!
This quiz has been taken 5095 times.
37% of people had this result.

Go ahead, take the quiz for yourself and figure out what kinda shadow you are!!!

Da Vinci Code Or Angels n Demons -- Which one's better???

2006-03-05T00:53:00.000+05:30

To HELL with Goofy start ups. Guess I am quite allergic to that. Ok let me start, so that I cut down on the Crap. I must admit I am not a voracious book reader. I was one, actually. Or so says my mom. When I was in my primary school, I used to read books that my mom bought for me... All at one go. That's what I often get to hear. And then I got my nasty sight defect and then all of a sudden I was discouraged from reading too many books. My parents were pretty sure my huge eye sight defect was due to my reading too many books and they were damn frightened that I would only worsen the defect reading too many books. Well, I cut down on books a lot.... Story books and novels became a strict no-no and Academic material was too boring to figure out. For me, listening in class was sufficient to top my class. Do I sound a bit arrogant??? Atleast this is what my classmates always wondered about. By the time I was in class 3, I had a penchant for quizzing and the ilk. I always dreamt of being on the TV in a quiz show. (Well, that never materialized). Or It would be apt if I said I was bitten by the quizzing bug. Now in order to become a good quizzer, one had to have a good knowledge of, say, everything. And this 'love' led me to magazines and newspapers. Well, you can pretty much call me a 'magazine lover', I guess. Loads of mags and lots of food stuff... You leave me on a deserted island.... Maybe I'll never call you back again.

I still remember, those days in 'Hostel'. Rush through my breakfast and run to the brother's quarters to read 'THE HINDU', 'Indian Express', 'Eenadu' and the rest, not to forget 'The Frontline' and 'The Sportstar'. And it became my unofficial duty... I was to deliver 'The Hindu' from The quarters to the Hostel every single day. When I was in class 8, the students favoured Deccan Chronicle over The Hindu. We were allowed just one newspaper to the hostel premises and almost all the students preferred the spicy, raunchy Deccan Chronicle over the "bulky, dry" Hindu. I just could not stand the yellow journalism offered by The Deccan and I had that heated argument with my warden... "Why the hell on earth would you replace the HINDU??? And do you think anyone is interested in the news they publish in the Chronicle??? Don't you understand that everyone is only interested in having a peep at those brash, flashy stuff from the fashion shows that the Chronicle publishes to woo the youth???" I guess he understood and we were allowed 2 papers everyday. Guess I won!!!
At home, the first thing I do as I wake up (Whatever time on earth it is) is get hold of 'THE Hindu' and 'Eenadu' as well..... Munch through each and every page till there's nothing left. All the while I am reading, one can find me ignoring my mom calling out "First Brush your teeth and then go through the paper" and my grandma pleading "Have ya breakfast... It's already too late". Well, I guess I cannot do without that.
I somehow make it a point to have a peek at "The Outlook", "India Today", "The Week", "The Sportstar" and the rest every week. Any train journey home, tag along these a car mag, mostly AutoCar or BSM and a "Filmfare" or some cheap movie masala talk. And I must admit I buy a few comics though I am not very much comfortable with them.

It had been quite some while until last autumn, that I had laid my hands on a novel. My last novel was something during my +2 days in Chennai. I guess it had been 2 years since I atleast glanced at a novel. Just magazines and newspapers for me for 2 years. It was while I was in Kgp that I heard of a novel going by the name "Five Point someone" -- by Chetan Bhagat, and that it was a rage all over the country and being an IITian ( a fresh one at that) I guess I was supposed to read that to get a feel of the place. I spent about a hundred bucks on that, finished it quite quickly in maybe 2 days. After that, Someone took that away from my room and I never got to see it once again. I really enjoyed that one because it had friendship, academics, naughty pranks and most of all, it had that "IIT LINGO" and "IIT Culture" written all over it. But then not everyone will enjoy it. There isn't a good plot, it's shoddily written and contains glaring errors . Sorry Chetan, but I will have to admit that it was plain mediocre stuff. Your book wouldn't have got off the shelves hadn't u been an IITian!!! I guess you know that pretty well too. I am sure that a non-iitian will loath reading the book except for maybe the spicy romp you deliberately forced into the story. And here I must warn everybody. "Don't ever lay your hands on Chetan's second book "One night @ The Call Centre"."
Gosh!!! I don't want to speak about that at all. If someone's really bugging you up and you are too timid to take your frustrations out on him/her, presenting this book to him/her would do you a world of good, I bet.

WARNING : SPOILER AHEAD... DO NOT PROCEED IF YOU HAVE ANY IDEAS OF READING ANY OF THE BOOKS BY DAN BROWN

And then came along the frequent headlines about the controversies stirred up by this International Best Seller by "Dan Brown" -- "The Da Vinci Code". How much ever I tried ignoring this work, this always fell within my purview with it being in the news, in the best selling lists.. etc. And one day I happened to read the basic platform around which the entire novel was based on. No wonder the whole world was talking about this book. The very fact that Jesus had a wife named Mary Magdalene and not only did Jesus marry her but that she bore his offspring shook my booty.... It just shivered my timbers. The book further goes on to state that Jesus' daughter was named Sarah and the holy bloodline still lives to this day. Which means Descendants of the Lord Jesus Christ are amongst us. It also states that there is a secret society named "Priory of Sion" which safeguards this secret to this day!!!! Or maybe it wants the world to know the truth!!! You can look at it whichever way you like. I am not a Christian and yet this revelation had me shell-shocked. Wonder how the reaction a staunch Catholic would be like???
The story starts off with the murder of the Grand Master (The Head) of the Priory of Sion and Dan Brown unravels the plot at breakneck pace.

Click here for the Basic Plot of The Da Vinci Code

Having heard so much of the book and also the lengthy discussions with friends about the validity of the theory propounded by the book, it was high time I laid hands on the book. I bought the book on one of my trips to Vizag and I was almost restless on the way back home. It was too tempting to keep the book safely wrapped in my bag. I reached home and was off to my room in a jiffy... with ofcourse this one along with me. 2 sittings was all it took. Just the usual supper call in between. I was so much into the book I almost forgot the whole world. It was quite a fascinating exhilarating ride reading the book. The plot thickened with each and every page, the event unfolded in a very grand manner, minute details were covered immaculately... God!!! Dan Brown had got everything right. I must say he did his homework perfectly. This novel just blew me off my feet. It was my best ever read. Initially I thought the reviews printed on the book were just a result of the controversial subject that it dealt with it. Even as I started the book, I felt that it was quite over-rated. But then as things started falling into place, I began to like and enjoy the story. I had also bought a copy of "Angels & Demons" along with "The Code" but then I wouldn't have in my wildest dreams imagined that I would complete 'Angels' too the very next day.

Click here for The basic plot of Angels & Demons

Having had a great liking for the DaVinci Code, I sauntered into reading 'Angels'. As I started reading this, it had a similar feel to the Code... Both were of very similar architecture. It was kinda boring at first but again here the plot being Anti-Church, just drew me in after a couple of pages and I did not rest until I had completed it full. One helluva read and I must admit this was much better than the Code I had just finished the day before. Once I had completed these 2 books I was in a kind of spell... I desperately wanted to get my hands on all the other books Dan Brown had written. He seemed a Genius to me. I browsed the net and found out his 2 other novels.... 'Digital Fortress' and 'Deception Point'. I was just waiting to go to Vizag one more time and when I went I made sure I returned with 'The Digital Fortress' with me. I couldn't buy 'Deception point' as well due to money constraints. Actually I had to make a tightrope walk -- do a few savings on that trip -- in order to buy Fortress.
Well, back home I started reading Fortress and was it interesting?? Naah. It seemed just about ok. It sounded all too familiar and I could guess the ending so easily. So pretty much bland it seemed. And then the tempo to read Deception point diminished to a large extent. Back in Kgp, after the holidays, I managed to get 'Deception Point' from a friend but then the mood is never right to carry on with the book. Hardly did I read one tenths of the book.... It seemed too ordinary.
Well, What was it that made The Code as well as Angels my most loved books of all time??? First thing that strikes you is the controversial nature of the plot. Added to the controversial nature of the plot are the twists and turns associated with the story. One gets to see very few people in the entire story but these characters carry different sentiments and emotions. Dan Brown has done great research and has made use of every tiny detail he has got on hand. He immaculately uses all his knowledge to craft a masterpiece. The plot in all his 4 novels starts with a murder, and the hero, is sent to investigate or get a peek at the murder/murderer even though he is far flung to do that job. He has just about a day or two to do the work asked of him and the time constraint makes it all the more interesting. All along he is tagged on to a female partner whom he never knew properly earlier. While you are at one location during the course of a chapter you will invariably be somewhere else in the next chapter. Brown is very much successful in carrying on the narrative parallel without disturbing the flow of the narrative. And while narrating the story he discloses a lot of funda about various places like the Louvre, churches in Britain or about the Priory of Sion etc.. All that Dan Brown mentions look so convincing and real, that I wonder if anyone would ever again imagine them being fictional. One thing is for sure, Dan Brown look so convincing.
In the Code and Angels as well, Robert Langdon is the protagonist and you will surely end up loving this fellow. You can surely identify yourself with him -- not the quintessential hulkster -- but the average human being prone to errors and more importantly down to earth. In both these books you will love to break the codes that are embedded in the story. Sample this out.... The letters of the word "Oh! Lame Saint" can be rearranged to form "The Mona Lisa".(One clue for the Protagonists in the story). Just go ahead with this book and you will find many more such anagrams to rack your brain. Quite fascinating stuff. You get to know what a cryptograph is and also what a Caesar's Box is!!! And you also get to know a lot more about Christ than you ever did and the Holy Grail.
While The code deals more with code breaking, Angels is more about symbols..... Symbols form the crux of Angels. The way Brown showcases the Illuminati and discusses its works -- The ambigrams -- words that read the same when seen topside or bottomside -- FIRE, AIR, EARTH, WATER and the ILLUMINATI DIAMOND -- it's just a treat to the eye. One just can't believe such symmetry can exist. The path that Langdon charters is well etched out in Angels -- how he hops on from one church to the other breaking the clues he is provided with. Quite racy and superbly written stuff. I never felt like taking a break while reading this one. Once the hunt to find out the missing Cardinals starts the book is unputdownable. One also gets to know a lot about the papal elections -- the elections of the pope and the functioning of the papacy. And in both these novels, your suspect keeps changing with time and you will never have suspected the final culprit until you enter the last few pages of the novel.

Here I need to mention about 'John Langdon' - the creator of these ambigrams. These ambigrams create awe in the minds of the reader. You just cannot ignore them. Just check out his cool website and a few other ambigrams he has created.
And I also would like to say I am eagerly awaiting the release of the movie, "The DaVinci Code" -- starring my favourite actor 'Tom Hanks' as Langdon and the extremely sweet and lovable 'Audrey Tatou' (Remember her from 'Amelie') as Sophie Neveu. The first theatrical trailer has been out long back and seeing that has got me all pumped up for viewing this epic story on screen. Would love watching this on the IMAX screen at Prasad's, Hyderabad. Just waiting for 19.05.06 to arrive. Will never miss this one!!!

But then why did I not like Fortress or Deception Point? Well too much of anything gets quite annoying. Fortress went on very much similar lines to the Code and Angels. The same initial murder of the most revered in his field, the same shifting of places via chapters, the most knowledgeable person being the killer, everything was the same. Add to that a dash of hi-fi funda 'bout computer code breaking and this becomes incorrigible after a point of time. Once I could figure out N.Dakota was an anagram for Tankado, half the story was out and there was no chance I would enjoy the story. Everything looked plain and somber. I could painfully complete it anyways.
Later when I got hold of Deception point, I just could not brace myself upto read it. Well I think its time you changed your style Mr Brown. You have become monotonic and painful. I sincerely wish Brown changes his writing style. I am not going to buy "The Solomon key" (expected for a September 2006 release) until I can catch hold of some decent reviews wherein I can feel some distinctive change in his writing style.
I'd deliberately not blurted out the endings of any of the books even though I wanted to when I began writing this post but then I just do not want to spoil the fun you can have reading the book. Go ahead and Experience the thrill of The Da Vinci Code as well as Angels & Demons. And I will fall back into my magazines unless I can hear of novels with equally intriguing plots and deft writing. Adios until then.

FRIENDSHIP – THE FLAVOUR OF THE WEEK

2006-03-02T14:46:00.000+05:30

It’s almost that time of the year when the seniors (4^th and the 5^th years) are busy job-hunting with the majority placed already by now. This is the time of the year where the sweet memories come rushing back. Strong hormone surges in the brain makes us wonder whether we can live to see such days again. Still having 2 more years to go with my stay here in KGP, I am anxiously looking forward to the day when I set out to attain loftier goals I have set for myself. Again, why am I drifting away from what I had to say?

Just wanted to say one of my personal favourites, something that plays quite a few times everyday on my Comp…, caught the emotions and piquant nature of the situation quite superbly in its lyrics. A must listen for every music lover. I like enjoying the emotions carried by the lyrics.

Here it goes

Song by VITAMIN C

Titled "Graduation (Friends Forever)"

And so we talked all night about the rest of our lives
Where we're gonna be when we turn 25
I keep thinking times will never change
Keep on thinking things will always be the same
But when we leave this year we won't be coming back
No more hanging out cause we're on a different track
And if you got something that you need to say

You better say it right now cause you don't have another day
Cause we're moving on and we can't slow down
These memories are playing like a film without sound
And I keep thinking of that night in June
I didn't know much of love
But it came too soon

And there was me and you
And then we got real blue
Stay at home talking on the telephone
We'd get so excited, we'd get so scared
Laughing at ourselves thinking life's not fair
And this is how it feels

[1] - As we go on
We remember
All the times we
Had together
And as our lives change
Come Whatever

We will still be
Friends Forever
So if we get the big jobs
And we make the big money
When we look back now
Will our jokes still be funny?
Will we still remember everything we learned in school?
Still be trying to break every single rule

Will little brainy Bobby be the stockbroker man?
Can Heather find a job that won't interfere with her tan?
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
And this is how it feels
La, la, la, la:
Yeah, yeah, yeah
La, la, la, la:
We will still be friends forever

Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now?
Can we survive it out there?
Can we make it somehow?
I guess I thought that this would never end
And suddenly it's like we're women and men
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us 'round?
Will these memories fade when I leave this town
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly

For those of you who haven’t heard the song before, I recommend it’s a must listen. For those of you who have heard this before I guess you share the same feelings as me and that you echo my thoughts.

A Big THANK YOU

2006-03-02T14:29:00.000+05:30

This is all I can say after the tremendous response to the post. “A BIG THANK YOU”. The concern everyone showed, the get well soon messages through the comments and the phone calls to SIVA makes me mighty satisfied. For all the love and concern each one showed, the prayers everyone made for his recovery, HE is discharged from B C ROY (THE INSTI HOSPITAL in KGP, for the uninitiated), is doing quite well and is ready to carry on. Last but not least, I thank “THE ALMIGHTY” for the valuable lessons we learnt, for strengthening the bon called FRIENDSHIP, for letting the world know the real ME and more importantly, for SIVA’s speedy recovery. Thankfully, The ALMIGHTY smiled on him and he could get through with the minimum possible injuries/damage. Now that everything is fine… Itz time we take him to TAMROLIPTO or GARDEN INN and demand our treat (hehe J) …. As I had already mentioned, I am just waiting for the BIRD FLU EPISODE to pass over.