Orkut!!!

Keeping a TAB on people you love/admire........ or is it STALKING???

Jobless No More :D

The WAIT was worth it.
"Fair"Isaac it is!!!
And Bangy of all Places :)
Couldn't have asked for more...............

P.S : 24 hrs since FI has offered me the job(that too on Day 1) and the feeling has not fully sunk in. I wanna jump up and down and howl and scream at the top of my voice. More in my next post.

Read My Mind

Ceaseless Doubts. Vacillating Thoughts.
Last Minute Hiccups. Scares and Alarms.
Puerile Distractions. Shaken Convictions.
Panic set in. Turmoil within.
Ego Deflated. As the Final Ride Begins.

Summoning Courage. Beckoning Calm.
I ride ahead. Weathering the Storm.

Under the Realization,
that the Outcome doesn't matter,
Once you've done your part!!!

Gyaan

Disclaimer: The opinions presented herewith are entirely born out of experience – a few experienced by self and a few from what I've seen from a distance. Anybody with a differing opinion is welcome. I do not expect total consensus nor do I want to thrust my ideology through anybody's throat. Just some random musings -- all unrelated, incoherent and insane.

We are unaware that we are lying almost half the time we fib. Half the time we do not know we are lying because we warp the truth so much in our own mind.

The Human Psyche is analogous to a balloon. Blow and it inflates. Also, poke it with a tiny pin and the whole bubble deflates.

No human is ever so gracious to completely forgive another of his transgressions. How much ever one tries to forgive and forget, at the back of one’s head keep nagging those lapses.

Solitude is an absolute godsend. Though people get desolate and forlorn after a while, it gives great scope for introspection – to assess oneself and to figure out who one really is and what one really plans to do.

Every man has an unknown feminine side to him. How much of it he manages to tap surely determines how far he can get into a woman’s life.

What you have been wallowing in for a long time, you do not realize its true worth. Whatever’s out of reach is what you actually crave for.

Pick up 10 random words from a word list and categorize them into +ve and –ve based on what they convey. You’ll most probably end up with a 3:7 ratio.

P.S: Not written while in a melancholic disposition. Better termed sober or even vacuous would be apposite.

Exam Induced Rest

I sure want to write about lots of stuff. But then, I really wonder if there is no time at all to pen down a few thoughts......

After the rigors of a MidSem Examination, I cannot think of anything else but rest the mind and give it some respite -- it deserves that I guess. As regards my performance, maybe the exams were just mediocre in every sense of the word but then I racked my brains damn hard and hence the well deserved breather.

P.S : Rest included completing 2 seasons of 'How I met your mother' -- Awesome Barney
A few P G Wodehouse Shorties -- Great Humour, Great Writing
Lil' bit of Freakonomics -- I haven't completed it yet :O
Scanning for new sitcoms -- Ventured into WonderYears, Joey, Gossip Girl, Rules of Engagement but honestly, I didn't like any.
Rummaging for Modern Rock Songs
And then hours and hours together on ''Quizroom2" on DC++ -- Awesome Place for Vocab enthusiasts. Whoa!!! This place rocks.

And here's a cute lil' game on the net I've been playin'.

I'd better get back to completing the code I'd have to submit tomorrow for the Evolutionary Computing Lab {Trust me, the course is as boring as the course name sounds interesting}. And btw, Rest Time's Over.

Nothing's goin' right

-- A switch in the LAN box trips and the whole wing is mired in darkness ( I mean disconnected from the rest of the world) for one whole week :O No mails, no DC++, no quizroom. For my wingies there is no Orkut, no CS, no AOE. It's worse than being starved.
-- It's my project guide's course and I turn up without doing my assignment. I botch up something clumsily on paper, create a few equations out of thin air, as he arrives checking. He notices the gibberish in my notebook and displays a stern face. What does that mean???
-- I do a little project work on my comp and the comp seems to have aged. Running a slightly cumbersome image conversion program crashes the system and restarts involuntarily. Should I get myself a laptop???
-- I meet my project guide almost after a gap of 20 days and all he says is "Keep meeting me now and then man."
-- I meet my guide for the 4th time in almost a week and he mistakes my aim at redemption for wanting more work and dumps a huge project onto me. What a pity!!! Now I have to work atleast 6 hours a week in the lab. Thank God, it's still coding that I get to do.
-- The first simulated CAT exam and I mess up while blackening the ovals on the OMR sheet.
-- The LAN starts working after a week and I open my inbox to find it empty :O
-- I take up a tag by TF and once Scribefire crashes and the other time the computer reboots for no reason. Rewrote it again from scratch.

Life's turning out quite Crazy. Huge workload and confusing schedules. Priorities keep changing by the minute. I do not know what to do.
I hate my life. Period. As I was telling mom the other day, 96 hours a day still wouldn't suffice to get me complete my work.
And again, I haven't been this busy in years. So I guess I am enjoying it as well. I love my life. How Ironic is that??? Or how much more INSANE can I get???

Music It is

Another tag by The twilightfairy
This time its about music.

1. Which song is being played in your mind right now?

“You were my everything” by Aviation.
I’ve heard this one over 60 times today. So what else could blare in my head right at this instant?

2. One song that describes your life…. (no self made compositions please)

“Patience” by Take That
“Bad Day” by Daniel Powter
“Chasing Cars” by Snow Patrol
“Trouble Sleeping” by The Perishers
“It ends tonight” by The All American Rejects
“It’s not Over” by Daughtry

Life’s so byzantine and convoluted that to encapsulate it within one song would be entirely out of question. So maybe the assortment here might paint a faint sketch of me. It’s got more to do with feel and the mood of the songs than with the lyrics....

3.The song you listen to most on your Ipod/Mp3 player/Cell/PC etc…

Most songs have a relatively short shelf-life when it comes to me. I listen repeatedly to a song until it isn’t fresh anymore or until I find another one. Poor “Dave”, who unfortunately is my neighbour, has to endure the same song repeatedly blaring from my speakers – mostly I use the repeat mode. Like it is “You were my everything” from Aviation today, “Paas Aaya Kyon” last week, Rihanna’s “Umbrella” the week before that and “Laare Choote” sometime in April ;)

But then there are those that surpass all boundaries and are a pleasure to the ears. These are the few that I turn to when I am down and out and need to rejuvenate, when I am happy and want to feel exuberant, when I am dismal and want to feel better and sometimes fro no reason at all. A few such that I can recollect right at this instant, I’ll mention below.

“Iris” –Goo Goo Dolls
“Hero” – Enrique Iglesias
“The Reason” - Hoobastank
“You’re Beautiful” - James Blunt
“Dream On” – Aerosmith
“Words” – Boyzone
“Hotel California” – Eagles
“Stairway to Heaven” – Led Zeppelin
“When you say nothing at all” – Ronan Keating
“Thank You” – Dido
“Diary of Jane” – Breaking Benjamin
“Horse with no name” –Americans
“Late GoodBye” – Poets of the Fall
“So Sick of Love songs” – Ne-Yo as well as the female version
“Wonderwall” - Oasis

Guess, I’d better stop here and move on.

4. A song that best describes the following days in your life.

School/College Days –“Summer of ’69” by Bryan Adams. Nothing else strikes my memory when you say school days. The selection is self explanatory.

Love – haven’t experienced it. So I’ll just quote the most romantic songs I’ve heard.
“Nothing in the world” by Atomic Kitten
“She’s Everything” by Brad Paisley. The lovely lyrics epitomize the perfect girlfriend I guess. I might be wrong, though.

Mood right now – “Colorblind” by Darius. Confused yet feels fine. Replace the girl in the song with workload.

5. Your all time favourite song, and the reason for it... maybe some memory/ some funny story/etc!!!
“Yeh Haseen Waadiyaan” from Roja
Rehman’s first and his best.

I remember singing this in some compulsory singing competition in school(must have been in class IV then) and amazingly ended up being selected for the school choir.

6. A song u wish u hadn't heard!!! (more than one is always a pleasure!!!)
Him(s)hesh Reshammiya -- No second thoughts on that.
Man!!! Is he a pain in the arse???

On a trip from Mysore to Ooty the driver couldn’t seem to get enough of him and we had to endure the songs all along the 6 hour trip and no prizes for guessing who ended up with a headache.

7. A song that would best describe..... Me[twilightfairy]
(Hey, I took pains to tag u, I guess I deserve this ;-) )
I do not know much about you. Everything I know about you is from reading the posts on your blog. So you maybe just come across as sweet and nice.
I am tempted to say “Angel of the Morning” by The Pretenders ;)

But then let me go with this lovely piece – “The Mass” by Era. Note the aura in the song.

8. If you were in an elevator with Himesh Reshammiya and Altaf Raja, you would..........
Murder Himesh by slitting his throat. Or cut off his nose, so he further can’t sing. Altaf doesn’t bother me that much.

Now to further tag somebody, I'd like to see Dave(my music GURU) write a similar one as and when he starts his blog. For now 'Rampage' I tag.

Roger Federer -- The Artist

I'd been wanting to write something about Federer for quite some time now. But then, With my limited vocab, I feared I would just be belittling the sublime artistry of the wonderful champion. His mind-numbing repertoire and arsenal of shots, his ability to change gears in a jiffy, his on court cool, calm and collected disposition, his amazing handling of pressure situations, his off court charity works, his body language and attitude, his respect for the legends as well as his peers, the humour and humility preset in his press conferences, his striking looks, his gorgeous smile...... Ooh!!! I can go on and on.

But then before I say anything more about the master, all his greatness is encompassed in this absolutely wonderful NIKE Ad. With a voice over by Tiger Woods and the absolutely apt music, this ad has been one of the best I have seen over the years. The twist at the end makes it all the more worthwhile.

P.S : For all the Nadal fans and Sampras aficionados, I truly admire them both too. Let's not compare Sampras and Federer. They were the best of their generation. How they would have fared if pitted against each other in their primes is just fodder for speculation. And Nadal is undoubtedly the best clay courter ever and might catch up with Federer very soon on the other surfaces as well. Love his fighting spirit.

Hmmmph.....

Yaay!!! The Competitive Streak in ME is still alive !!!

Alas, the Hardworking Me is Dead. Period.

P.S: Sadly True :(
I need a kick in the arse to get me started.
Dude,Wake Up!!!

The Impregnable Fortress

Another semester has arrived and we are back to the customary routine. How easily we slip into the routine after a lazy holiday still astounds me.

Just like every other semester, this one too promises to be a harbinger of many good things, nay great things -- I am just required to put in the requisite hard work. Pronouncing this sem the key to my entire future would be making an understatement. With my GRE scheduled for October and then CAT for November followed by the Placement season all December, this one promises to be a make or break sem. My entire future hinges on these few months ahead.

So for now, all I am doing is HOPE -- hope that everything turns out right. Here I can't refrain from this inspirational quote from one of my favourite movies of all time, The Shawshank Redemption -- Andy Dufresne's immortal lines to Red.

"Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies."

So, as I sign off with Hope, wish me luck, my friends, in my endeavours.

Song in the background : Umbrella by Rihanna feat. Jay-Z

P.S: Oops!!! I almost forgot. The title......
The Impregnable Fortress = a 9 point SGPA
This is something that I have come so close to achieving the last two sems but one which still conveniently eludes me. I still have 2 more shots at it though-- still it feels a lil' painful having 'just' missed the mark, twice at that.

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The 8RF Game...

I've been tagged by Twilight Fairy....

Here are the rules:

1.Players start with 8 random facts about themselves.
2.Those who are tagged should post these rules and their 8 random facts.
3.Players should tag 8 other people and notify them they have been tagged.

Now that I have had my fill of "lazing and relaxing" after the rigours of the last fortnight of my intern, it's time to return to the usual mode of life. Any more lazing around and I will just be boring myself to death. So here goes 8 random facts about me.

1. Last 7 days Liquid Consumption Stats

Aerated Drinks (Coke/Thums Up/Appy Fizz) -- 22 bottles (500ml each or is it 600???)
(Just back after counting the bottles heap in the kitchen)
Water -- Hardly 2 such bottles.

Me on a lonely island with an unlimited supply of softdrinks -- I'm sure I can make it through.
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2. I seriously believe that my favourite sporting heroes are jinxed when I watch them live.
Like the only ball of the 2003 cricket WC tournament that I watched live, Sachin Tendulkar was out to Shoaib Akhtar. I sauntered to the television room when he was on the verge of his century and then it was all over!!! :(
Federer lost the French Open 2006 while I watched it live and Schumi's engine blew in the Japanese GP last year denying him his rightful title.
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3. I suppose I am low on self esteem. I deride myself a huge deal in front of others. I seriously do not know if I consider myself a weaker earthling than the person(s) in front or if the derision I heap on myself is a result of my insecurity and fear of failure.
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4. I am a loner. Being an only child, I have no idea as to what it feels like having a brother or a sister. I long to be pampered. I wish to pamper someone and feel protective about that person. I seriously wish I had a brother or a sister. But then again, being an only child always comes attached with lots of goodies -- and so I'm not complaining too much.
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5. I don't know if this is normal. But I have never had any crushes all my life -- be it cine stars, classmates or whoever whatever.
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6. I used to be a sucker for marks. Topping the class was all I used to think of and subsequently put a lot of pressure on myself.
I was always the topper of my class until I set foot in the rarefied hallows of IIT -- where I broke free off my self imposed shackles and topping the class has never been on my agenda since.
I still remember vividly the incident when I scored 16 1/4 marks in Telugu during a unit test and my competitors for the first rank scored 16 3/4 marks in the same. I cried so badly for the half mark they'd gained on me, that I threw up in the class, much to the embarrassment of the teacher and myself.
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7. My last year of stay at Kharagpur will be the 17th year of hostel life for me. 17 of 21. That's a huge number, I guess. I'd bet I have seen a huge array of people than the average person and the whole melange of characters from the motley crowd that has passed by me has made me quite worldly wise.
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8. I write long e-mails and long letters -- but the recipients haven't ever complained about their length.
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Whoooo!!! Didn't know I had to slog out so hard at that one.
And finding 8 more people :O
Well, let's save that for another day.

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Oh.... Wow O Wow !!!

This feels real good. A Huge Morale Booster especially at a time when I am pondering at all the unwise steps I took during the course of my life.

The Outlook-CNN-IBN poll places IIT Kharagpur back at the Numero Uno position in the Engineering College rankings. Back to the top. I still remember those message T-shirts junta used to flaunt when I was in my first year, proudly proclaiming, "IIT Kgp....Lonely at the Top" . Then there was the fall from grace!!! Slowly the tees vanished too.

I still cannot comprehend how these rankings are done and how the jugglery of the top 5 IIT's can happen in the rankings each year when there isn't much of a change in the way each IIT functions. Maybe just a little bit of infrastructure addition -- which appears to be of the same magnitude in all the IIT's because they have very similar fund allocations. How much ever the rankings and the ranking system may puzzle me, it is so refreshing to see my dear insti back at the top of the ladder. All I needed was a reason to move out of the gloominess and what better reason than this. Has pepped up my spirits and got me kicking.

Addendum: As if one isn't sufficient, here goes another--The Dataquest Rankings where IIT Kgp again tops the charts. :)

Further Snippets -- Bangalore Life

Today signals the completion of 4 weeks(that's one half of my expected stay) of my work here @ Tata ELXSI, the -- The odd Elxsi is a Singaporean company that ventured into a joint venture with the Tata's and then slipped off into oblivion, but the name sounding different and maybe, posh, hung on. Considering the fact that at almost exactly the same time of the year last year, I was wriggling and writhing to get out of Vizag Steel Plant and Hyundai Motors India Ltd, painfully counting the days left out of the 3 week and 2 week schedule respectively, this is a huge huge improvement given that I am looking forward to the next 4 weeks. Great going, I must say.
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Weekends have gotten so stereotypical what with Bangalore having just malls, malls and more malls, and mind you, nothing else. It's Saturday and so we rush to the Inox theater @ Garuda Mall, to catch a 10:00 AM show. That's the only show on the weekends available for less than a 100 bucks, 99 to be exact. Venture out in the afternoon and the rates escalate to 200. Now don't count me out for being a miser, but then I simply don't think it's worth it spending 200 bucks on a movie -- a gamble on 2 or more precious hours of your life without the surety that you wouldn't run a headache at the end of it all.
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After the movie, we are off to some restaurant and after that, we lazily roam about the streets before hitting another mall, where a Landmark or a Crossword consumes most of our time. Ah!!! Bliss it is to spend some time in the company of books, wanting to buy this and that and everything. Reading a few passages from those that you happen to lay your eyes on and getting the mind into a fix deciding as to which book to take along with you to provide companionship and solace for the week and which to discard for some other time.
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After I reach back home in the night after some frantic window shopping at the malls, its time to hit the bed. Sundays, I mostly have some carried over work from office. So Sunday is for a little bit of rest at home and spending time with "F.R.I.E.N.D.S" and Seinfeld.
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Last week, we'd been to see 'Cheeni Kum' -- the best romantic comedy ever made in Hindi. Awesome dialogues, Characters one could so easily relate to, Sharp witted humour matched with great performances by the cast. Go watch it -- You'll love the jokes on chhatris and chachas, few scenes that will linger in your head for a long, long time. Though I must admit the second half was bland, boring and not even half as energy filled as the first one. Well, you have to admit though, you can't not have some dramabaazi and expect a saccharine comedy all through. It has to meander to an end somewhere. This week, its Pirates of the Caribbean.
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Last Sunday, The outgoing batch of 2001 of St John's, Gannavaram had a get together, a reunion. And guess who was missing??? Yours truly, Me!!! Oh!!! How I missed not being able to go there. I was working on my presentation for Monday when guys called up and talked to me. I was completely put off-- mood out -- for 2 hours and had to roll up in my cot to get that bad feeling out. Seeing the photos on the group makes me more jealous. Guess all of them had a jolly good time. Pesky Little Brats, all grown-ups now -- Miss you all so much.
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Coming to the HUGEST thing that happened to me at my workplace. My first BIG presentation in office. Note the keyword -- BIG. BIG doesn't exactly capture the magnitude of vastness, the hugeness of the presentation. It was colossal in many ways. Highly designated people among the audience. (Huge Play of Nerves on my part. You'd expect that naturally. Slipped on fine into my presenter's role after the first 2 minutes.) Twitched eyebrows. Stoic expressions. Questions all over in the air. Suggestions flew thick and fast. Scampered solutions. (I had to make up many, on-the-spot.) It was more of a brainstorming session that went on for 2 hours. And at the end of it all, all I had was lot of feedback, little bit of appreciation and much more work to do.
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CGPA, Cumulative Grade Point Average, and SGPA, Semester Grade Point Average, are huge depressants, I learnt yesterday. I was thinking about these after a long long time and the very mention of those dreaded words sent shivers down my spine. I could no more do any work. It spilled into a headache and I had to take permission yesterday to take the afternoon off -- I had the feeling that my head was about to burst from pressure. How my life revolves around my CGPA at this instant. Which brings me back to the cliched phrase -- How I wish I knew it's importance the moment I entered IIT.
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Finished Reading
The Namesake by Jhumpa Lahiri -- Great insight into NRI life. Quite moving at the end. Sluggish Pace but quite lovable and enjoyable.
Eleven Minutes by Paulo Coelho -- The only one to write like he can, where the author uses the story of a prostitute as a metaphor to bring out the difference between love and sex. And there is a lot more one can get from it.
The Great Indian Novel by Shashi Tharoor -- enjoyable at first but then flip past the initial 100 pages and it gets monotonous and 'Awww!!! Please Stop', you'd hear yourself say. He marries the Mahabharata with the British Raj -- and the funniness reaches a yielding point very soon, turning itself to torture.
The Inheritance of Loss by Kiran Desai -- needs a bigger review. Maybe when I am out of this intern, I'll write a review. Winner of the Man Booker Prize 2006. And I have many interesting observations about it.
The Nude by Nergis Dalal -- It's a collection of short stories. Crappy book and Sick in many senses. (nothing porno about it -- just a few sick stories on relationships.)

Currently Reading
Above Average -- by Amitabha Bagchi, an IIT professor writing about an IITian. (Guess it's semi-autobiographical.)
120 days of Sodom -- by Marquis De Sade, the man responsible for the birth of the eponym - Sadism. (e-book)

In the shelf
To Kill a Mocking Bird -- by Harper Lee. I'd been wanting to read this one in a long, long time.
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Before I sign off, I must remind myself. One hour of Office time in writing my memoirs -- Who's gonna read them anyways??? I just like the freedom I enjoy at the workplace here. Hoping to have a great weekend. Auf Widerschen until then.

Time Flies!!!

More than a month since my last post!!!
Guess I have been procrastinating a lot. But then putting of things for a later date has become a way of life, I guess. I do have so many things to yap about, though.

-- Like I want to talk about the awfully-gone-wrong End semester exams, where I'd expected one thing and what appeared in the paper was another.

-- Like my 1 week stay at home, where each day I'd had to brave things that I'd get to hear, hidden away safely from me all through a semester so that it doesnt affect my stay at IIT.

-- Like I want to talk about my addiction to sitcoms especially Seinfeld as well as Two and a Half men. Like I want to write a post on the awesome and frighteningly witty one-liners in 2.5 men. Sample this -- "Love isn't blind. It's retarded!!!" :P

-- Like my developing cold feet to travel for my summer internship from my hometown to Bangalore on a unconfirmed AC 2 tier ticket.

-- Like my hodgy podgy trip the next day , this time, on a half confirmed ;), yes you heard it right, half confirmed, sleeper class ticket.

-- Like my waiting for my brother to pick me up at the Bangalore station and he awaiting a call from me announcing my arrival, thus resulting in my being stranded on the platform for atleast an hour or so.

-- Like my workplace here at TATA ELXSI, the energy sapping workplace, busy and reticent people all around my workstation, the workaholics adjacent my cabin, demanding superiors and an altogether different lifestyle that I've accustomed myself to.

-- Like the 20 minute drive from office to the bus stop and the 30 minute walk from the bus stop to my brother's place. Crazy!!! Ain't it???

-- Like the excruciatingly difficult "loner" times I have to spend in the evenings - immersing myself in novels, waiting for my brother to get back home so that we can have dinner together.

-- Like the interesting design project I have been assigned with - to design a kitchen cabinet with an easily accessible bottom rack, so that you wouldn't need to bend down and hurt your hips. (My mudhead is awaiting some sudden spark. But I must confess it hasn't been in working mode for the past 3 years. So you guys could help me through this. Any ideas welcome here :D)

-- Like my spending the first week trying to bypass proxies to access google and yahoo mail and sports sites that are blocked in office. (Successfully managed that in the end!!! Yippeeee :B)

-- Like I want to talk about how much I loved the first half of the movie 'Life in a METRO'. WOW !!! Sizzling, Scandalous and Unabashed Concoction of Extra Marital Affairs. Enough material to ponder over how westernized we have become and hopefully questioning whether we have crossed the line or not.

-- Like how I felt very bad for "Gogol" of "The Namesake", especially in the concluding pages. Something made my heart heavy, sorrow engulfing both the auricles and ventricles -- Feeling bad for his having to be emotionally and physically torn between two continents, for having had 4 failed relations, for not really understanding who he is and what he is meant to be.

-- Like walking around malls, window shopping with nothing in mind - gazing at Swarovski, drooling over Tag Hueur and desiring that slim piece of IPod Nano.

-- Like I want to comment about the artificial Bangalore life, the dullness that hangs in the air and the confused looks on the faces of many. One thing Bangalore has managed to do to me is feel insecure about not having a girlfriend. :P Guess that feel surfaces in anyone when in a crowd of 100 there are 40 couples at the very least!!!

So much to talk about. So little time. If I don't get back to work now, I'd be lagging behind on my schedule. Got a presentation to make this Thursday -- my first deliverable here. So back I go to work. Ciao............

P.S : Yooooo :D My first post from OFFICE!!! Deserves a celebration and a Pat!!!

Candid Confessions -- Have I hit NADIR???

>>---> Unenthusiastic(adj)
apathetic, indifferent, unresponsive, lukewarm, half-hearted, subdued, cool, unimpressed, unexcited, uninterested

Microsoft® Encarta® Reference Library 2005. © 1993-2004 Microsoft Corporation. All rights reserved.

No GRE Preparation that one. 'Twas my status message in Gtalk a few days back!!!

Have you ever felt so damn tied down with work and yet felt like you don't really want to move a finger but just relax??? If you'd ever felt that way, you would understand what my status was trying to convey. When a friend who was online asked me what I was up to, I quickly lamented "No work" while I actually meant, "Lots of work to do, dude, but zilch tempo".

Well, Sample My Workload -- 2 Term Papers, 1 B Plan submission, 1 Project Report, 3 Class Tests and One Huge MATLAB Program all in the span of a week. All I do is sit in front of computer doing absolutely random crap or loiter around the corridor just hoping the mood to complete (or start) the work just pops out of nowhere. Wonder how that's feasible??? I need someone to fix my mind. Anyone out there to help fix it???

>>---> One of my childhood pals reminded me the other day how down in the dumps and sulky I have been behaving of late. He says “You’ve put a plug to all your humour channels."(Wonder if I had one in the first place, though the way he was talking, he meant I had many :D) "Creativity is an offspring of humour", he goes on. So he says he notices a dearth of creativity and humour in all my actions, writings and thoughts..... I just sighed. He at least meant I had been funny and witty and creative for some part of my life.

>>---> I used to pride myself over having a strong memory..... Well, Not anymore!!! I was in a quiz the last week when a few questions I'd heard before popped up. However hard I tried, I couldn't just recall the answers. Just as the quiz master gave out the answer, I'd gasp and let out a "Ptch....Shit, I knew this. Should have got it". Damn!!!

>>---> My tummy's looking like it's going to explode. Well, what else do you expect when you gorge twice a day at the very many Nescafe outlets that have mushroomed in the campus? This puff, That sandwich, This tart, That muffin and what not, finally washed down with a refreshingly chilled Ice Tea. No lunch, No supper in our rotten mess. Just Nescafe!!! My taste buds are having a blast while my pockets are getting blasted..... Damn big hole I can see already.

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POWER is like doing DRUGS

"Power tends to corrupt.
Absolute power Corrupts absolutely."

Just the slightest hint of power seems to set off a chemical reaction in the head of any/every person bestowed with it. It's hard to stay away from sinning as a result of that "Chemical Locha". Even if it is just trivial powers you have, I'd bet, it is insanely impossible to prevent yourself from nepotism, swindling as well as quite hard maintaining a docile head all through.

Power is like doing drugs.
Once you've had little, you want more.
Once you've had it, you're no more YOU.

The past few months, I've accidentally stumbled upon seemingly innocuous and nice people -- I'd have vouched for their sincerity and steadfastness before they were in power --, being the cause of some astonishingly unimaginable acts, after power had been thrust on them. Power can change most people -- 180 degree the persona changes. One just can't help.

Those already corrupt and knowing the privileges power carries along with it go to any depths to possess it. I don't want to get any controversial but then a respectable college going guy cleaning seniors' plates for being a part of a committee of 20 people. Just Yuck!!! It's so demeaning oneself. Surely there must be better ways of making it to the destination. And if there aren't any, it only means that the system is highly flawed and needs a change.

So those of you who have mistakenly stumbled upon this and might assume "Power" in the near future -- Just review your self every now and then once you get the clout in your hands and please do keep the degree of nepotism, swindling and all that down to the bare minimum and more importantly, you would do with a sane head on your shoulders, because as I already emphasized power corrupts anybody -- You, Me or Anybody else on Planet Earth.

P.S: Power hasn't spared me either. Being the SPL (School Pupil Leader) in my class 10, I used to favour my friends in many aspects -- guilty on several charges of nepotism.

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Peace of Mind

Life offers some funny twists along it's path. It's imperative that life doesn't provide everything on a platter but then little do we realize that very fact. Of late, the innumerable twists and turns that have engulfed my life have left me bewildered.

I have been befuddled with a stream of such nasty twists -- never before did I witness such a sudden spurt of tricky situations. At first, it seemed kind of awkward. Then, to add to that, my reactions to these intricacies defied all logic. Maybe the shocking nature of these petty convolutions agitated me and pretty upset me leading to those diverse, extreme, unsolicited responses.

I haven't been the same since. Lost in Thoughts.

So many questions float in the air. Concentration has been wavering since. So the march begins to set things right.

Before I attempt putting things back on the right track, I still have many unanswered questions.

What is it that I want ???
What have I set out to achieve???
What will be the aftermath of my decisions???

Nothing is clear. Yet I am determined. I don't want trivial unimportant issues to ruin the big picture.

Still in the elusive search for PEACE OF MIND...........

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So Sweet

Someone just told me something so very sweet!!! So very adoring and so very cute!!! Yeah, actually something about me............, yes ME !!!

It is moments like this that brighten up my Life and make it worthwhile. Suddenly makes me realize somebody does appreciate me for what I am and for what I have been.... And Thank You so very much for livening up my everything and assuring that I am not all that bad a person I conjure myself to be!!! More importantly, letting me know what you feel..........

Sounds Cliched. Can't help. Too excited right now............

P.S : Typed out a few hours back. Delayed posting it on the blog.

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MASS BUNK

Finally!!!
My first MASS BUNK in Kgp. And it's taken 3 years. 3 long years.
Feels good. Feels I've(We've) achieved something. And I seriously don't understand why I am feeling that way.

We had our ED(Engineering Drawing) Lab of our Machine Design Course scheduled at 14:00hrs today. Most of us were in the drawing room(our lab) by around 14:10hrs. The professor arrived at 14:20hrs and wrote down a screwjack design problem on the board. He then proceeded to give some instructions and then left us with work on our hands and said he'd be back after sometime. Not one of us had a smidgen of an idea as to what was to be done regards the problem. 5 minutes passed.... and everyone of us was out of the room, sipping coffee at the Nescafe outlet. Another 5 minutes later everyone was on their way back to the room. I guess, as I type this stuff out, the professor must have just gone back to the room to see our progress. Would like to have a look at his expression for once!!!
It might not be quite right to feel so exhilarated but then most of my friends in non-IIT colleges do boast of having mass bunked very many classes. So now I got something to speak of when they begin to brag about bunking and mass bunking. Maybe my animation right now stems from my having attained those bragging rights as well.

On a totally unconnected note, I broke my spectacles yesterday while practicing for the Inter-Hall Basketball tourney. That reminds me, I was detected with myopia when I was in class 4. I've been wearing spectacles since.
I hated my glasses in the beginning. They actually brought on many nicknames and I hated my glasses for bringing me such misery. But I grew used to them(both the glasses and the nicks) and gradually started loving my specs. I can't imagine a day without them. (Yeah, I can't see anything without them for sure ;) I just wanted to put that differently.) I love them.
I had 2 spares ready. And while I was digging my cupboard and bags for the spares, I found 2 other broken ones as well as a pair of contacts to go with my spares. I haven't used contacts just for the reason that I need to feel some weight on my nose. I've become so very used to spectacles. Love you. So now I have 3 glasses for repair. Whoa!!!

Another thing I'd read just recently and wanted to share here -- This article in IIT-B's student paper. Most IITians will surely find some common chord with the feelings of the author. At least, I felt quite bitter while I was reading this. You might not agree upon wholly with what he says, but then it would be rather foolish to discard all of what he states as being ridiculous and trashy. According to me, the system does need a change -- both the professors and the students as well. A lot of mindsets need to be changed as well and drastically at that.

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Varied Hues of Life !!!

Life is so colourful. My saying that wouldn't be much of a surprise, given today is Holi -- The festival soaked with colours and to me, more the festival of freeing the spirit and revelling in the joy of it.

It's my 3rd Holi here at Kgp and maybe that was why I wasn't so very enthusiastic about it this year. So were a few other friends who'd, I might say become used to hullabaloo surrounding the event every year. So with kind of dampened spirits we just strode out, got our shirts torn (This time my shorts were spared however) and had a few photos taken. Mild Fun, I must say!!!

If Holi wasn't that fabulous, then why was I ranting about Life being so colorful??? Well, it has to do with the various other happenings in my life. And don't be mislead. Colourful doesn't always need to mean groundbreaking achievements or shout aloud stories. Just having had a myriad of emotions to go through and also a mix of events taking place made me wonder truly how varied, multi-layered and multi-coloured LIFE was turning out to be.

This summer, am headed to TATA ELXSI, Bangalore for my 2 month summer internship. It wasn't my preferred destination in any case but then that was the best intern in Bangalore that my CG could garner me. How I finally got to choose ELXSI can form the basis for another post -- a long story. There were just four guys ahead of me on the CG basis and four of them grabbed all the companies in Bangalore that paid heavily. Heights of BAD LUCK, you can say!!! Am Bestowed with loads of that. At first, I was cursing my fate, my non-commitment to studies during the first and second years and what not. But then as time goes by, I realize I am not in a bad spot after all. I am beginning to like what I got -- not that I am forcing myself to. It's just that their field of work and their workplace excite me. So finally no qualms and it's a nice feeling!!! :)
And do check out their website. I started loving the company once I saw the website!!!

Another achievement I must rant about here is my getting insanely high marks in a mid-semester examination in KGP. This midsem I almost had a cent percent score in a subject in which I badly wanted to score. A FIRST for me in many respects (in KGP). A huge MORALE BOOSTER for my endsems, but I better hope the other subjects that I'd not performed satisfactorily won't turn out to ruin my party.

Project work is on in FULL SWING!!! Deadlines to match and Loads of stuff to read. Only the mind is not willing to co-operate. I was googling and downloading stuff for my project having bunked the InterHall Basketball practice, hoping to find something substantial for my project and lo, I am here blogging it out. Which reminds me of tomorrow's deadline. So let me bid goodbye and get back to doing something more purposeful.

Auf Widersehen.

And hope to blog more regularly (and hopefully not morose stuff like this!!!)

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St.Valentine must probably be turning in his grave!!!

St.Valentine was never a messiah for love..... There are numerous versions of how the day came into being. And there are an equal number of stories about the history of the day.

I was browsing for the actual history of the day when I found this link and many more such. The article on Wiki does not show a unique legend on whose name this day is celebrated. There seem to a fairly large number of St.Valentines or Mr.Valentines. Quite surprised infact, that such a widely celebrated day does not even have accurate history. All botched and made up for the convenience of a certain few commercial ventures/brands that make the most out of mislead people.

Of all the stories I came across, I'd prefer to believe the one about Valentine performing marriages when they were deemed illegal and hence being beheaded. He secretly married couples when marriage was forbidden by the Roman emperor and he was beheaded on this day.

It isn't a bad thing to celebrate LOVE. But these days, People use his name and create a lot of brouhaha and ruckus about being in love and use his name(and in particular this day) to do all sorts of rubbish. So, I guess, he must literally be at unrest in his grave as to how unimaginatively his name and intentions are being misused disguising lust and infatuation as love...................

P.S : Well, it isn't the frustration of not having a Valentine that I am showing off here. I am single and I am fine with it. All I am irked at is the non-sense I've seen people do on this day...... Literally!!!

LIFE

Somewhere along the way, mediocrity creeps in. You become complacent. You take things too easily, take things for granted. All seems fine for a while. And, then suddenly, a loud THWACK on the face.

LIFE IS A BITCH!!! It slaps you hard and how.

Suddenly reality presents itself before you. The gravity of the situation knocks the wind out of your sails. Before you can realize that you are mired in a deep pit, it moves ahead, seemingly with a fierce fervour. Now you try to drag yourself out with whatever you can find hold of. It’s an epic struggle. Most give up while the prudent, stubborn few fight on to get back on track. The lucky few who resurface find that it’s too far ahead now. You have been thrown off track. So you now know all you can do is to play Catch Up. You keep sprinting desperately with determination and HOPE – an immortal soul. But then…………….

Note : Intern Blues

New Year. New Sem

Wish you a HAPPY AND PROSPEROUS NEW YEAR

(I know its quite late in the day but then its the wishes that count I guess!!!)

Exit 2006. Enter 2007.

As if it makes much of a difference. Life still is the same I guess. The old problems stay. Newer ones await in the wings. So what significance does a New Year hold??? I might sound quite cold and preposterous when I divulge I do not attach much importance to a New Year's Day. It just is another day in this bland routine cycle called Life. Isn't it???

Four or Five years back, I would have been busy on New Year's eve preparing a list of resolutions for the New Year. I also had the habit of making this resolution thingy on my birthday as well. So twice a year, I usually made a list of resolutions and twice a year i wouldn't stick to what I ordered for myself. As the years flew by, I realised I was making a futile effort in trying to change my way of life. Every passing year has been a confirmation of my not sticking to atleast a single resolution I decided upon. So as I grew older and, rightly, wiser, I decided I wouldn't make myself look stupid anymore. So I bid goodbye to writing lists which also meant a lot of energy and time and paper and ink saved. So right now I am not forcing myself to act differently in any sense. Just nice being just ME.

As the importance of the day waned, so did the greetings I'd send. The only recipients this year were my aunt and my school teachers. I did not spend a buck on the phone wishing a friend or relative. It also had to do with the mind tuned to the fact that lines are always busy on New Year's day and it would be a gargantuan task to just get to someone on the phone. A calm day infact.

And oh, Thanks to the Timetable that is adhered to in Kgp, I had to spend a sizeable chunk of New Year's day( 10 hrs to be exact) in the train, for the third year running. So few of us had a small cake cutting bash in the train itself. The cake cutting had more to do with the growling stomach(s) than being a celebration instead. And with Jan 1st almost always being the start of the spring semester every year, it is generally a semester of hope. Every semester at the start I hope to do well and this time it is no different. Sitting pretty on my good performance last semester, I wish to carry forward the momentum this semester. But then Spring Sem has always been my Achilles heel. So I need to carefully tread and see that history isn't repeated. I know I can mess up big time. Hence I need be careful.

Add to that the fact that CAT is just 10 months and a few days away, so I need to prepare a routine for my preparation. 6th semester also comes gift wrapped with a project. So its project time as well. And we need to get geared up for a 2 month internship after the semester and the hunt for an internship too intensifies this sem. Hence the semester finally equates out to CATting + Intern Hunt + Project Work + CG. Wow!!! All in all, a Gala time awaiting me I guess.

So, I sign off the first post this year with no resolutions -- Will just be Me -- and also with clear cut goals for the semester -- the measure of success meant for another post right at the end of the semester. Adios till the next one.

Photo Courtesy of Hallmark Greetings